Post # 1
*Sigh* Bees, I just don’t think we can catch a break. Right now I’m unemployed and in school, and SO is working night shifts and paying both of our expenses. We’re living with my parents in an effort to save money to move in a year– but look how well that’s going. We have nothing saved. My dad realized the amount he was charging us was outrageous and lowered the rent– then he turned around and renigged on another prior agreement that he and SO had made, effectively cancelling out our savings. SO is also paying off a vet bill in my name that my parents racked up.
We’re struggling to get by. But we could manage- even if we couldn’t save- until I can find a job.
At least until today. Apparently, the car dealership SO bought his car from sold his loan to another company (without there being anything in his contract stating they could do this, so we’re already ticked. How is this even legal?!). This other company claims they will honor his original contract– oh, except for the bit where he has to have higher insurance than what the original company required, or we could pay their oh-so-generous plan PLUS our normal insurance, since their plan actually isn’t insurance and they can’t provideus with an insurance card, even thugh insurance is kind of what that extra fee is for. That little stipulation means we’re about to have to choose between gas for driving the car and cell phones or paying insurance for the car. We can’t really drop any other bills because our rent bundles everything else- utilities, groceries.
*Sigh* I feel like the universe is just kicking us when we’re down. Originally I was pissed, but now I’m just… tired. I just want to give up. I don’t have the strength or energy to deal with this right now.
Post # 3
@ForeverBirds: Oh no sweetie! Hugs. Real life sucks sometimes doesn’t it? 🙁 All the best to you guys!
Post # 4
Go to a credit union and see if you can get them to take the loan. Credit unions are a dream.
Post # 5
That sucks. 🙁 Can you drop cell phones? You live with your parents right? Is there a landline you can use for those times that you absolutely have to use the phone?
If it were me, I would drop the cell phones. I mean, do we HAVE to have them? Think about it. People used to go about their daily life without a cell phone all the time! If they did it, so can we 🙂
Or if you can’t drop the cell phones, then drop the data. You don’t need smartphones, just a basic phone that can make calls.
Also, I might have missed this in your previous thread but is there a reason why you are not able to get a part-time job? If nothing’s hiring, have you considered freelance writing? I ask because you can go to websites like http://www.elance.com or http://www.textbroker.com.
You seem to write very well so you might do okay there. You won’t make a lot of money but hey, every little bit helps.
I know it’s tough but hang in there! Y’all will climb your way out of this eventually 🙂
Post # 6
you need to be living on a budget… if you don’t mind posting it or pm me and i’d love to help you. I’m a math nerd and i actually enjoy this kind of thing. I’ve become a master of mine. You need to write down on paper every single expense you have and every dime you have coming in. It seems like you probably have an income problem and you might need to get a part time job at the grocery store even but without living on a budget you won’t really be able to tell your money where to go.
also if you were barely getting by to begin with, why did he finance a car? I hope the payment is atleast small and on a used car?
Post # 7
@ForeverBirds: I’m confused as to how your parents racked up a vet bill in your name. I don’t see how that isn’t fraud, they should be responsible for the bill at least.
Post # 8
@LadyBlackheart: No house phone; SO is on a low, prepaid plan with a basic phone and I’m still on my parent’s family contract until next July. But thanks for the tip on freelance writing! (Nowhere hiring is exactly my issue!)
@Kate0558: When he got the car, we were doing fine. But in the last couple of months we’ve had things come up that have messed us up. We’d just gotten caught up after having to replace his car battery and timing belt– the car is used and cheap, but unfortunately that means that repairs have to be made sometimes.
@housebee: That’s a long-ish story. My mom and I took in our family dog (we have one family dog and she had three that were her own); she didn’t have ID so I put him in my name. We paid that bill in full that day, as well as the bill for the check up two weeks later.
Well, come to find out, my parents took that dog in again, as well as two of Mama’s other dogs and since I already had an account, just put him in my name, but they couldn’t pay the bill.
So, yes, it is fraud, and I could take my parents to court or file a police report, but I don’t want to. I am mad, but the two dogs of Mama’s were emergencies (one died from injuries and the other would have died during the night if she hadn’t made it to the vet) so it’s not like these were things that could have waited. I mean, if they had told me I wouldn’t have said “No, let the dog die.” After the bill is paid, I’m going to hand my dad a receipt and we’ll work out a date for him to pay SO and me back (since his car will also be paid off).
Post # 9
I think you guys should not be paying rent until the vet bill is paid back to you in full.
Post # 11
@ForeverBirds: why can’t you print out the vet reciept, show your parents and then subtract your rent from that?
ie if you’re paying 250 a month and the vet bill is 750, tell them that you’re not paying rent for the next three months, you’re paying that money to the vet.
if they don’t go for that, i would let them know that because you can’t pay both you’ll need to send the vet bill to collections and notify the collections agency that they should be contacting your parents for payment.
Post # 12
@peonyinlove: Exactly, thank you!
I understand if your parents are hard up for cash too, but its absolutely NOT OK for them to be making your financial situation worse because of theirs! Theres no way I would be paying rent until that bill was squared up. If that caused undue hardship, i would pay a portion of rent each month and put the rest of your “rent” towards their debt.
Post # 13
@ForeverBirds: also – unless they specifically moved for you to live with them (bigger apartment or whatever) other than bills increasing they haven’t actually incurred any extra debts to house you. so why can’t they reduce or remove the rent (other than bills or other overages, parking space for instance) until you’re back on your feet / vet bill is paid off?
i think it’s really sketchy to be essentially making money off your kids who don’t have it IF they were living there with the same rent prior.
and too bad so sad about their finances and that they can’t pay the vet bill – neither can you. so you’re equal. but only one of you lied (them) and only one of you is refusing to do the right thing and take responsibility for the fraud (them). ie – don’t pay that, they should have thought about ‘we can’t pay’ before they spent money you don’t have on your behalf.
also – call the vet! tell them that unless you are there to sign the reciept, they should not be extending credit to people who aren’t you.
Post # 14
@ForeverBirds: About the car.. you really are lucky if any loan provider was letting you not have full coverage on a car. They want to be able to recoup insurance money if you crash the car. Crappy that they sold it, but consider yourselves lucky to not have been paying it all along.
About the vet bill, PP’s are right about not paying rent. At the very least sit down with your parents and divide it into so many “payments” and subtract it from your rent. I pay you, you pay me – doesn’t make sense. They owe you, don’t pay them.
I’m currently hiring someone to work 2 days a week to wash cars. There are jobs out there. Get your resume to a temp agency and let them know you’re willing to do anything. They have skills tests for typing, etc, and will give you short-term assignments that fit your schedule and skills and you can make a buck here and there.
Post # 15
@housebee: , @crayfish: I’m afraid if we did that my parents would kick us out and then we wouldn’t have anywhere to go. Until we get our car paid off (and then we can lower our insurance coverage) we can’t afford to move out.
@peonyinlove: I’m afraid if we did that my parents would kick us out and then we wouldn’t have anywhere to go. Until we get our car paid off (and then we can lower our insurance coverage) we can’t afford to move out. And the bill is in collections— that’s how I found out about it in the first place, but collections can’t do anything until I file a report. But I have talked to the vet and made it clear that if they allow anyone to put a bill in my name again, it’s on their head. It’s just a huge mess. I realize my parents are wrong- but at the time what were they supposed to do? Let the animals die? These were literally emergency, life-or-death situations, it’s not like I ended up with a bill for booster shots or a nail clipping.
Post # 16
@ForeverBirds: no, they are supposed to come to you immediately after and say, ‘this is what happened. here’s the plan to pay you back’ ie – cancel the rent.
i get they are your parents, but they certainly aren’t doing you any favours my dumping bills on you and ruining your credit by letting it go to collections, so i would do what i need to do to stay in the house, but i wouldn’t buy into the ‘what was i supposed to do – let the dog die?’ thing. clearly there are ways to own up and take responsibility and they have done zero of them.