Weddingbee boards

Hi Bees!

It's been a while, so time for another update.  I don't know how to link previous posts, so if you search under me, you will see what I posted around Christmas time and setting shopping.

I'm pretty damn upset, I don't understand how the person that is supposed to love you so much, would say you and him are going to do something, then "forget" or what have you.

Over Christmas he said he was going to propose but since family was not able to come to town, he wanted to wait, and he didn't have time to shop to have the diamond mounted in a setting.  I understood about the family thing.  Even went as far as to look at settings online, found a Tacori that I loved, found it in Nashville. Went to far as to talk about taking a day trip to Nashville to look at it after Valentine's Day.

End of last month i forget how it started, but he said, "lets not get each other anything for Valentine's this year..."

I was like, ah okay if that's what you want to do.  

What about Nashville, I ask.  I thought we were going to go look at rings?

We were?  he asks.

Are you fucking kidding me?

I ask him, do you remember anything we talk about or do I need to record it?

He pawns it off, I'm fed up so I shut down.

I ended up finding Tacori here in town tried the ring on and discovered I didn't like it.  Found some Scott Kay rings that were lovely.  Took the numbers down and gave him the card.

"Here, this is the last time I'm mentioning it. This is what I like."

I asked him what his problem was and he said he was starting to feel pressure.  That has been his biggest thing, pressure.  

Now mind you I have not said one thing after we made the Nashville plans until he got all forgetful.  Not one thing.

I told him as much and he said he is getting pressure from other people.

How the hell am I supposed to control that?

While looking for a paper this morning he was emptying out his wallet, the card is still in there.  I guess that's nice.

I can't wait for Valentine's Day to come and go.  Makes me sick thinking about it.

He is so up and down you know?

Like last night, watching that movie, "what's your number"  when the sister was getting married, he looks at me and says, "We're getting married on the beach."

i just smile.  

Can't get married without being engaged first.

I'm sorry for this all over the place rant.  I've been bent about this for a while.  It hurts even more when I'm maid of honor and he is best man of a wedding we are in coming up this summer.  All this wedding stuff, in my face.  It would be nice to have that sparkle on my hand to know my someday is just a bit closer.

We see his family this summer.  I guess I can hope for it then since wanting his family around was/is so important to him.

Now I'm wondering if that was even a way to buy him more time to appease me.  

Sigh.  

Aw I am sorry your plans didn't work out!

Try not to take it so hard that he forgot, it's a guy thing. The other week the topic of Valentine's day came up and my SO asked me "um so when is that again." He is absolutely terrible with dates! I couldn't help but start laughing! That date is always plastered all over the television and cards, etc but after 25 years he still can't remember it. Sometimes you just have to take these things in stride. =)

Hopefully your proposal will come soon. Good luck!!

I'm so sorry you're upset about the whole situation, I totally get where you're coming from. Some days BF talks about being pressured and other days he'll ask random questions about engagements/weddings. It is very frustrating. Especially the not listening part.

I think you should definitely talk to him about how you're feeling though, I'm always upfront with BF about things that bother me for more than a day or so and it usually helps. I think he would be open to more discussion, especially since he was supposed to propose around Christmas and it's been two months. If he gave you that deadline then in my opinion he shouldn't be feeling "pressured" and he needs to be open to talking with you about it. Good luck :)

@Gingernx01:  I suppose I should remember he doesn't even remember his mothers own birthday....

Summer will be the make it or break it point.  Thank you for reminding me of men and their forgetfulness. ;-)

I am going to give it a bit of time, if he brings the subject up, that is when I will discuss it.  I am really trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and see what summer brings.

Thank you for your kind words. :)

@garaninc:  We'll be together 5 years come October.  How did you handle things between the 5th-6th year before your SO proposed?