- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2011
So by no means am I writing this to be judgy. I just think all the Bees currently planning their weddings can learn from another’s mistakes.
I went to a wedding last weekend that was one of the coldest and most impersonal weddings I’ve every experienced. Also it had so many logistical annoyances that everyone was commenting on them. The decor was nice and the bride looked beautiful but it was really a testiment to the fact that the most important thing about any wedding is warm, love and allowing the personality of the couple to shine through.
The ceremony was cold and impersonal. The couple didn’t say any vows, the officiant didn’t say anything personal about the couple or even welcome the guests. The couple literally uttered one word each during the ceremony: yes The officiant didn’t smile the entire time and neither did the couple. The ceremony was 100% religious doctrine even though the couple is not religious and don’t attend church on a regular basis. So please select your officiant carefully and make sure the ceremony is about you as a couple.
Out of the 300 guests that were at the reception only about 50 showed up to the ceremony. Not really something the couple could have controlled but WTF?!
The invitation said the ceremony was starting at 5pm. We got there at 4:58 fearing we were late. We were literally the first ones there and the florist had just arrived to decorate the church. The ceremony started 30 minutes later. My family and I were super annoyed because we had to rush to get there.
The photographer and videographer positioned themselves at the very front of the aisle as if they were the guests of honor. All we saw during the ceremony were their backs. About mid way through the ceremony the photographer paused the ceremony to take some formal posed shots of the couple and their family up at the alter. The rest of us just had to sit and watch. It was bizarre and frankly rude.
this is a photo of our view during the ceremony. the bride and groom are at the front but all we saw was the photographer and videographer’s back.
The reception was just as cold as the ceremony. At no point did anyone say any words, give a toast or a speech. Basically if it wasn’t for the bride in the white dress, it could have been just a party. The whole thing felts so cold and impersonal. It’s so important for the hosts to welcome their guests, for the bride and groom to express some gratitude and words of love and for at least a few speeches about the bride and groom. That’s what makes the whole thing special and personal yet there was none of that.
The bride and groom barely smiled and were almost never together.
The photographer and videographer where so obtrusive. They weren’t capturing the wedding, they were staging it. They were attached to the bride and groom and constantly posing them and telling them what to do. It felt like we were on a wedding movie set and not at a wedding.
Multiple vendors, like the photog, the baker, the florist, left promotional materials all over the reception. Every place setting had a business card for the baker, the sign in table had flyers for the photographer, etc. It was in really poor taste.
There was no set up for coffee or tea service. Usually there is either a self service coffee station set up or a carafe of coffee brought to the table with coffee cups. At this wedding we had to chase down a waiter to get some coffee and we saw most other guests doing the same. Fresh fruit were brought to the table as dessert but the cake didn’t make it to the tables until like 2 hours later. It was just completely disorganized.
The biggest issue was definitely how cold the whole thing felt. The only time the bride and groom smiled was for the cameras.