Post # 1
I feel like this automatically puts me at bridezilla status!! I interviewed 5 highly recommended wedding planners last June and hired one who had great references. A few people mentioned that early on she wasn’t great returning emails, but once the wedding got closer she was great. When we hired her, I told her that I would be writing my dissertation, applying for jobs, and moving across the country in May/June of 2013 and wanted to have the big items already planned. She said that would be fine but here I am, 7 days until my dissertation defense, with no florist/linens/chairs and about to fire my wedding planner.
I did notice that she wasn’t really speedy with emails in the beginning, but we were so far from the wedding it didn’t really matter. However, it never got better and now we’re 3.5 months from the wedding and I can hardly get a hold of her! For example, in the contract I was supposed to get a planning checklist to be updated as we do things which I never got. I even specifically asked her for it 2 months ago and never heard back. Also, we met with her florist (they work together and we can’t seem to contact the florist directly) on March 29th and we still don’t have a contract signed. I had to pester her to even get a proposal, which took 6 weeks, and then it takes weeks to get any changes finalized. Speaking of florals, some of you may recall another post I made about how she wanted to go way overboard with florals for the ceremony and would not respect my wishes to keep it simple (called my ideas “boring and cheap”).
We found a clause in the contract that says “In case of cancellation or postponement, all reservation fees are non refundable. Cancellation within 90 days of the event must pay 75% of the total fee.” We paid her deposit last June, which I am not expecting to get back, but I think we won’t have to pay her the rest of the money for the contract because we are still 113 days out. Plus, she breached the contract by never giving me the checklist and it also said she would assist with invitations and calligraphy, which she didn’t because I went low-budget with those (Wedding Paper Divas).
We found another highly recommended planner who is available on our date and will do a 2 month contract for $200 less than we were going to pay our original planner for the rest of her contract. She said they respond to calls/emails within 24 hours and she’s taken over one of our previous wedding planner’s weddings before and didn’t have any issues with her demanding more money. We also talked to a florist and rental company who will do everything for less than the previous wedding planner’s companies.
I’m really just pissed because I wanted wedding planning (and the wedding of course), to be a happy and laid-back experience. Maybe I was naive, especially with a high-strung mother involved, but I really have not gotten stressed out about anything with this wedding except the wedding planner!! And she makes my mom even more upset, and then my mom complains to me and that stresses me out more. I feel like she ruined the planning process for me because now I will always remember that I had to fire my wedding planner!!
Post # 3
Good luck as you move on. It sucks being put in this situation but – these things need to be planned already. You don’t know how many other brides are using your same vendors. This isn’t just rude its unbusinesslike. YOu need to review her ona few sites so people can be warned next time.
Post # 4
sorry to hear what you are going through. i’m sure everything will work out fine and you will have a beautiful wedding.
take the original wedding planner to small claims court if you need to. you don’t need a lawyer for that.
Post # 5
She sounds terrible, I don’t think firing her makes you a bridezilla at all. You’re paying her to make your life easier, not stress you out and badmouth your ideas. She had her chance and she blew it, it’s time to try someone else who will actually reply to emails.
Post # 6
@Arrowchan: Yeah that’s exactly it, the whole reason I hired a planner was to make this process stress free. In retrospect, I really didn’t need one but I thought the process would be a lot more work than it is. I do want a DOC though, and our venue requires it, so hopefully this new one will be better!
@ajillity81: Hopefully it won’t come to that! I’m going to be living across the country and I know my parents wouldn’t bother taking her to court.
Post # 7
@RunnerBride13: As a certified wedding planner (in Canada, currently inactive), I think you have every right to fire someone who’s doing this to you. You should always be able to contact any vendors, and she should not be pushing you into things you don’t want. It sounds like you definitely have grounds for breech of contract, IMO (not legally binding advice). Good luck with your new planner.
Post # 8
Don’t worry, I’d do the same thing. If you feel bad about it, not writing a negative review is plenty generous. Or write one. It’ll be ok. Have a happy wedding day! And good luck on your dissertation defense.
Post # 9
Thanks guys. We sent her a nice email and she did not take it well. Her response had several words in all caps with lots of exclamation marks and was very defensive. We did not respond, but may after a few days to let her cool down. She didn’t seem to understand the problems and her response was pretty unprofessional. Oh well, we have a new wedding planner and a florist and already have gotten more done in the past 2 days than in the past 2 months with the other wedding planner.
Post # 10
Good choice! So glad you changed. The whole point of a planner is it makes your workload less, not more!!
I’m on the same date as you and we’ve only just really started planning as we’ve had to more our wedding forward (see other post from me) and, with a different season, totally change our plan. I’m sure this other planner won’t have done any lasting damage to your planning and your day will go off without a hitch (well except for you actually getting hitched).
Have a lovely wedding!!
Post # 11
Do it! Firing my coordinator (and finding another) was one of the best moves I’ve made in this entire process. I wound up having to dip into another part of my budget to pay for this new lady, but I’m so happy to have her. Also, she’s not the absolute greatest with speedy communication (an issue I actually didn’t have with the first lady) BUT, I’m so confident in her work and her vision and she has been so professional and accomodating that I don’t even mind. If I haven’t heard from her in awhile I think “oh she must be busy, let me give her a gentle reminder.” With the first lady I immediately thought the worst whenever there was a problem because I had no confidence in her in general.
Post # 12
@RunnerBride13: so she responded quickly when you fired her but not when you needed something from her, that’s annoying.
noone should call your ideas “boring and cheap”.
oh well, at least you got the new planner and she’s already being responsive. Now focus on your dissertation! And good luck!
Post # 13
@RunnerBride13: Firstly, I’m really sorry you are going though this! In this process, anything that goes wrong we, as brides, are very sensitive to, because we know this will (hopefully!) be our only planning and wedding experience for the rest of our lives. It’s not wonder we are such perfectionists about the details and our emotions along the way, because we want to remember it with only fond memories. So, know that we around here can totally relate and definitely empathize.
I also wanted to say that, there is a good chance that you could actually plan your own wedding (it has been really simple for me, pesonally) and just hire a day-of coordinator to keep you for doing all the little things on the day-of that the bride shouldn’t have to worry about. I think your ability to plan your own wedding depends upon how many details you want (my wedding admittedly doesn’t have a whole lot, just typical decor).
Post # 14
Sounds like firing her was a good move! She wasn’t holding up her end of the contract and was causing you MORE stress in the end. Not worth it!
Hope you have a great wedding!! (and less stress!!)
Post # 15
@Kat: Oh I agree, I’ve pretty much planned everything myself and it’s been easy (aside from the wedding planner). We got this new planner’s smallest package which just includes organizing the contracts, 1 meeting, and all of the day-of coordination.
@PeachSnapple: Very true! Thanks!
Post # 16
sounds like you made the right move.