(Closed) What about cupcakes for select guests???

posted 8 years ago in Food
Post # 3
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

I think its rude to only let some guests have cupcakes and exclude everyone else.  If the cupcakes are a thank you present and they are wrapped and meant to be eaten at home, that’s one thing.  But if you intend to display them and be part of the dessert course, that is something else.

Post # 4
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

Are you having a RD?  Could you do them then?

Post # 6
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I agree. I’d give them to them the day before at the rehersal dinner. It would be a nice dessert since that’s the “core group” of people you want to give them to. Why do something that’s awkward at the wedding? Not to mention it’ll be more appreciated at a time when there isn’t cake available.

Post # 7
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

RD = Reherasal Dinner.

It sounded like you wanted to honor special people and those might be the same as the people you’d have at your RD.

I did have one special cupcake that I gave out at my wedding.  It was my cousin’s birthday and the 30th anniversary of my grandfather’s death.  I remembered my cousin didn’t have a first birthday celebration and he was sharing his day with us.  My aunt (his mom) was really touched.

Post # 8
Member
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I agree with the above posters – fantastic idea, just don’t hand them out at the reception. Do it at the RD, before the ceremony, etc. I think this would be an awesome thank you gift!

Post # 10
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee

As long as it is boxed and you don’t have a wedding that has 10 guests and you give it to 9 helpful people, I think you will be ok.  (note this applies to any amount of guest where you are thanking a large proportion of them)

Post # 11
Member
2030 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I would be upset.

Post # 12
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Another bride posted a similar issue about wanting to serve champagne only to herself and her wedding party since it was too expensive to serve to everyone.

I think both the champagne and cupcake ideas are rude and you shouldn’t do it. I see how you are trying to be nice and honor people with something you think is a great gift, but other guests will see it and wonder where their cupcake is. It’s one thing if it’s a bracelet or a flask, you can’t serve special food to only a select vip group of people.

However, I told the champagne bride that I thought if only she and her husband were served champagne that would be fine. Because who could ever fault the bride and groom for getting something extra at their reception? But the second you are going to give it to 1 guest, you have to provide it to everyone.

Post # 14
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I don’t necessarily think I would be upset, but I would find it rude. I think that’s why rehearsal dinners are where people give gifts – because it’s not polite to be giving gifts to some while excluding the majority of your guests at the reception itself.  Since you aren’t doing a RD, maybe you can do a brunch later on after the wedding to honor the people who helped you and give them their thank you cupcakes at that point.

Post # 16
Member
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

There’s nothing rude whatsoever about handing out a wrapped token of your appreciation during a thank you speech. As a guest I would not be upset at all as I just showed up instead of put hard work into making the wedding happen like the recipients of the tokens. I’m still getting cake so whatever.

Complainers will always complain about something. I think it’s sweet!

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