What about what I want?!?!

posted 3 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
2355 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Just tell her you want a bridal shower and that FI isn’t interested in a couple’s shower, anyway. Let her know that your BMs and mom are starting to organize it and would love her help with that. There’s truly nothing for her to get offended or upset about. Don’t be scared. Two showers is a terrible idea.

Post # 4
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would just tell her! The sooner the better. (And also, I’ve been to a BUNCH of couple’s showers… And they were super awkward! The men CLEARLY didn’t want to be there!)

Post # 5
Member
1028 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@MsW-to-MrsM:  +1. In this situation it sounds like honesty is the best policy. You dont have to be nasty or cruel to convey your true feelings! Just let her know what you the plans were already and that this is the place of comfort for both you and your fiance. She doesnt have to like it but hopefully she will respect your truth! Best of luck!

Post # 7
Member
1793 posts
Buzzing bee

Definitely grow that backbone!  The sooner the better and you need to tell her.  Where on Earth did she get the idea you guys were having a couples shower?  Do you think it was just born of her hatred of bridal showers?  I mean, geez, I seriously hate the games, but I love the rest of it.

Post # 9
Member
1041 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I would think that whoever is throwing you the bridal shower could straighten her out? You would think they might want to involve her so they could mention innocently something about what her son should do that day so he’s out of way for your shower? Or less innocently your Mother could say how much she hates couples showers and is so glad that they are giving you a traditional bridal shower haha.

Post # 10
Member
7206 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@alyssaC:  “How do I tell her that my bridesmaids and mom can’t help her with it because they are already planning my bridal shower,”

You don’t – your FI does.

I think this is definitely one of those cases where FI handles it. Not only is it his mother, but he’s the “beneficiary” of a couples’ shower so he’s the one who should decline it.

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