Post # 1
I remember learning about the Triangular Theory of Love in college and think it’s a super interesting way to think about relationships, especially as they change over time. All the posts about sexual issues, lack of romance, being “best friends”, loving so hard it hurts, etc… can be understood in some ways by looking at what type of love characterizes the relationship. In a nutshell, here’s the theory: there are different forms of love, based on the relative presence of intimacy, passion, and commitment in any relationship. This ranges from non-love (not having any of these three things) to consummate love, which is having all three in your relationship.
So, before voting, take a look at the Wikipedia page (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triangular_theory_of_love) and see which type of love fits you best.
What did you put, and why? Did this change from the beginning of your relationship to now? If you’re a newlywed, do you see things continuing to evolve?
Post # 3
Most of the time we are probably Companionate Love most of the time, with some Consummate Love here and there. But I think the biggest lack of typical sexual passion in our relationship is due to meds i’m on and health problems. We’re both completely happy with what we’ve got. In fact, we feel like an old married couple =]
I feel like we’ve been this way for about 4-5 years, honestly. Esp since we were ldr
Post # 4
That is really interesting. I voted companionate love because we’re waiting till marriage for sex, but we have a physical relationship now… so… I guess it could kind of be the other one too… but not really. 🙂
Post # 5
I voted Companionate too 🙂 but I think the longer we’re together (and in person, since we’ve been an LDR couple from the start), the more we’re moving towards Consummate Love
Post # 6
I voted Consummate Love, though at the beginning, even though we fell in love pretty damn fast, it was mostly Infatuated Love. We met in January, moved in together by April, and somewhere in February(?) is when he said he loved me? We were in a LDR for those four months we weren’t together (which, I know is nothing compared to some of you!) and I had just driven there, we had done our business and were eating dinner, and he said “can I just tell you I love you NOW?” in this weird sort of explosive, exasperated tone. It was really adorable.
Anyway, now, we cycle between the Compassionate love, and the Consummate love, we go through dry periods, but most of the time, everything is pretty darn well balanced. That’s not to say it didn’t take work to get here, and it doesn’t take some work to maintain…but I feel pretty freaking well-rounded, relationship wise 🙂
Post # 7
Consumate – I’ve taken this test three times over the course of our relationship and it’s been interesting to see our relationship’s growth through the results.
Post # 8
Somewhere between consummate and companionate for me. I think everyone’s passion rises and falls from time to time. If it was there 100% of the time that would be pretty exhausting…
Post # 9
I’m just like piglet where it should be Compassionate, but its infact a little of consumate as well
Post # 10
Companionate all of the time and Consumate more than half the time. I don’t have a particularly high sex drive other wise it would be Consumate all of the time.
Post # 11
I’d say for Boyfriend or Best Friend and I it is consummate and companionate, consummate when it comes to commitment (no ring yet but commitment to be faithful and to be there for each other). We are in “consummate” love about 30% of the time which is perfect for us both, we are flirty, snuggle-y (snuggle-y in private, we aren’t fans of excessive PDA), and intimate/passionate but its not an all the time thing which then brings us to companionate love. Ups and downs like everyone elses relationships. 🙂
I really liked this poll.
Post # 12
Consummate! We’re pretty lucky. We have very strong chemistry on all four counts: physical, spiritual, emotional, and intellectual.
I mean, we fight too. It’s not all puppies and roses. But we are very blessed.