What are you putting your FI in charge of planning by himself?

posted 3 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: If you gave your FI something to plan, how did it go?
    They did a fantastic job, better than I imagined! : (10 votes)
    14 %
    They did great, exactly what I would have wanted! : (11 votes)
    15 %
    They did ok. I wouldn't have picked it, but it worked out. : (8 votes)
    11 %
    It wasn't very good. I wish I had done it myself. : (2 votes)
    3 %
    We planned everything together. : (15 votes)
    20 %
    They didn't plan anything on their own. : (25 votes)
    34 %
    Other : (3 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    430 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    I’ve actually put SO in charge of planning the honeymoon – he’s way pickier than I am about travel (I’ll go anywhere as long as it’s safe), so I don’t want to have to try and find somewhere that SO won’t complain about. As far as I know, he’s looking into doing the east coast of Canada, New Zealand, or possible St. Lucia. I’m sure he’ll do a phenomenal job; he’s never given me any reason to doubt his abilities! 

    Post # 5
    Member
    1437 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I didn’t really “put” FI in charge of anything but there are certain tasks he’s just taken up on his own without my asking…such as e-mailing potential officiants, negotiating our contract with our venue, researching his and his groomsemen’s attire, and several other things.

    Often he’s actually more on top of things than I am. We’ll just be sitting around watching TV, and he’ll say something like, “Oh hey, have you thought about a photobooth? I found a few different companies that offer them…”

    I’ve been incredibly impressed at how much initiative he’s taken. It’s really cool to see that he’s excited about it!

    Post # 6
    Member
    922 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I haven’t put FI in charge of anything. Honestly, he’s not the planning type and has no desire to be. I do ask for his input though on things I think he may care about 

    Post # 7
    Member
    17 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    The music, he’s really picky about this and most of the songs I have suggested have been shot down… So maybe that’s backfired a bit but we did choose our first dance song together. His and his groomsmans attire has also been selected by him (with my overall ok by request – I did the same with the bridesmaids attire) he also did the lighting plan and model And my brother is creating it for us. In general tho we have made all the decisions (except my dress) together which has been really great and really made it feel like ‘our’ wedding

    Post # 8
    Member
    2073 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Mine is doing the honeymoon too.

    @CanadaMoose:  Our FI’s sound the same lol!  We’re just south of you, in Barrie!  My FI is planning it all and I dont’ want to know where we’re going til we get to the airport.  He’s way pickier about travel too. If it were up to me, we’d do an all inclusive in Jamaica or something.  However, he just started a new job and will be in training for the next 18 months so we might have to post pone our honeymoon 🙁

    Post # 9
    Member
    730 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014 - South Bonson Pier & Community Centre

    @HonoraryNerd:  I’m in the opposite position – I wanted to elope, FH wanted the big wedding. I’m still stuck planning it all. He thinks because he’s paying for half of it, he’s doing just as much as I am. Ugh. Can you tell I’m frustrated? I’ve left the cake and favours (macarons) up to him entirely (he’s a chef), but I don’t know how that will all work out… He’s really gotten on board with planning the honeymoon, which is the last thing on my mind after all of this, and he’s picked out what his groomsmen are wearing.

     

    Post # 10
    Member
    3249 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @HonoraryNerd:  On the craft beer subject, I comissoned a cask for our wedding, and it was ludicrously affordable.  You guys should call around to local breweries, or, better yet, go in, and try to talk to the brewer, or Brewster.  Come to think of it, that was when I had success, when I talked to the brewers, not the sales managers.  It was awesome, because that ale on,y ever existed one time, at our wedding, and will never exist again!

    Post # 11
    Member
    5199 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Wedding planning is not in my DH’s wheelhouse. 

    I delegated 3 tasks to him. 

     – One he completed on his own – finding himself something to wear.  He stressed me out a bit by doing it at the last minute (litterally 2 weeks before the wedding) but did a fantastic job.

     – The other two I ended up having to help him complete, about a week before the wedding(choosing a 1st dance song and telling the groomsmen what to wear). 

    It was a bit annoying that he didn’t just complete those two things on his own, but it wasn’t a big deal. 

    Ultimately, I’m just glad that I didn’t have to get an additional person involved in a lot of the details, and that he was supportive of my choices.  There were enough opinions going on between my mom, my sister, and I!

    Post # 12
    Member
    10219 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Mr TTR & I are Encores… and we Eloped

    We planned most things as a two-some

    Altho I had some very distinct ideas about the Back Home Reception for our Family & Friends (then again he had some very set ideas about what he wanted to deliver for me for our Honeymoon)

    At any rate, neither of us were disappointed by the work that the other person did.

    The Honeymoon was INCREDIBLE (best vacation of my life)

    And after the Back Home Reception, Mr TTR told me I did an AWESOME job and he was very happy that I had suggested it, and put forth the effot

    — — —

    Even my First Wedding some 30+ years ago, my Ex Hubby and I worked closely together with my Parents (who paid for the Reception Dinner) to ensure that we were ALL on the same page.

    We had a very traditonal union (common for the 1980s)… and my Ex Hubby planned all the Honeymoon.  He did a good job.

    Everything I think turned out GREAT because we were always very open about our communications, vision, etc.

    I wouldn’t have it any other way…

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    529 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Well, I’d like for things to get done, so he’s not touching anything. I wanted to have him plan the honeymoon, but he wasn’t getting around to it, and admitted he would’ve probably booked a last minute cruise, which would’ve been so upsetting to me-so I booked our trip.

    I also wanted him to find his own wedding band-not happening. Same with officiant because it is his priest…yea I’m filing and coordinating all of it. He had some specific ideas about what he wanted to wear, so he picked that-but he’s not getting involved in anything else because we’re only 5 months out, and we can’t wait on him to sit on a project for months that won’t get done anyway.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1864 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @lollygagon:  +1 Wedding planning is not my fiancé’s cup of tea. He took his daughter shopping for a flower girl dress today (we are in separate cities) and he called me confused asking me “They wanna know if we want off white or white or ivory?” “What dress type are you wanting again” and “I don’t know what I’m doing, I’m totally out of my element here”. LOL. I could just see him at the bridal shop with deer in headlights! 

    I get his opinions on things (different photographers, videographers, etc. that I have researched) and we decide together who we want to book, but in terms of actually putting him in charge of something, nothing as of now. He knows that he is in charge of attire (picking out a style for him and the guys) as well as making sure the groomsmen all get there stuff in order. He’s got great style so I have no fear of what he picks. 

    He also knows that he needs to put together a song list of music he likes to give to the DJ. 

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