Do you have any bridal party regrets?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
7203 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I only had 2 – best friend since I was 10, and my younger sister. I don’t regret it at all. Nor do I regret not including less close friends who I’ve kept contact with – they were there as guests, that was enough.

Post # 4
Member
8282 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I didn’t have 1 family member in mine because I am just not close with any of my cousins.  Honestly, if my dad had been alive, I think I would have had my mom as my MOH.  She’s been my true best friend forever, but since she was walking me down the aisle, I had my best friend as my MOH, 1 other close friend as a BM and a sister-in-law as a BM.

Post # 5
Member
1679 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I loved my bridal party; I absolutely picked the right girls to stand by me (2 sisters, 2 sisters-in-law, 1 high school friend, 1 college friend). However, I really wish I could have included my grade school friends. As it was I had 6 girls and DH only had 4 guys (and he wasn’t asking anyone else), so if I had included my grammar school friends it would have been 10 girls and 4 guys, and that would have been ridiculous. I asked the 4 of them to do a blessing, and that was really special, but it would have been awesome for them to be bridesmaids too.

Post # 6
Member
3084 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I love my MOH. She’s great. 

Post # 7
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

We had a couple regrets…

My MOH who I chose, backed out and Idk if she is even coming to the wedding now, skipped the shower. I grew up with one of my BM and shouldve just made her the MOH from the beginning. She is the MOH now but I dont want her to think she is a replacement…bc she truly always was a better friend, I just didnt origonally chose her bc she is in 4 weddings this summer, her baby just turned one and she just moved an hour away…so I didnt want to add any stress…all is well though and she has been awesome…but I lost my original MOH and I guess we are no longer friends.

 

My FI regrets his choice as well as his long time friend and him had a falling out and they are no longer really close anymore..

 

Needless to say, we have decided to get out more and hopefully make new friends. 

Post # 8
Member
1226 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My sister is a BM, and she really hasn’t been involved at all (apart from inviting someone to the bridal shower, despite the fact that she is not hosting). I figured that would be the case though. My MOH, on the other hand, has been excellent!

Post # 9
Member
1295 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I made the decision not to include a lifelong friend which ended up being a great decision even though it was really hard.

So far there are no regrets with the girls I chose. I just went with my gut

Post # 10
Member
1491 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

No regrets in my bridal party.  I have my best friend from college as my MOH and a newer friend from my old job as my other bridesmaid.  They have been fantastic bridesmaids…super supportive, fun, amusing and keeping me excited, happy and sane.   I could not ask for more!!!

 

I deliberately picked people who were not embroiled in their own negative drama and showed true enthusiasm and excitement about my engagement and upcoming wedding.   Planning a wedding is hard enough, you don’t need someone in your bridal party bringing you down!!!   

Post # 11
Member
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Jennybenny16:  I can relate completely to what you’re feeling. My two co-matrons are my close friends, but in my mind I think I consider them closer than they consider me. One even reacted that she was shocked that I asked her because she thought that I “would have had closer people whom I could ask.” That stung a bit.

I’ve never been one for ultra-close friendships, and have gone through so many cycles of friends.

Post # 12
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I have no regrets on our bridal party. We had no bridesmaids or groomsmen. We had our nieces and nephews walk down the aisle (2 Jr. Bridesmaids (my niece and cousin), a flower girl (my youngest niece) and 2 ring bearers (my nephew and my husbands nephew)).

Everything worked out perfectly and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way!

Post # 13
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I have my older sister as my MOH, which I now regret because she has decided to have her own wedding reception the day after my wedding (to celebrate her wedding that was 10 months ago). Needless to say, she has not been much help and only wants to talk about her reception. I so badly want to be supportive but the bitterness keeps rising. She met a man and got married quickly at the courthouse after she was pregnant, did not invite family besides me and my mom, and had a small BBQ afterwards with some of his family and friends to celebrate. I know this is going to sound terrible/selfish, but I have been with my fiancée for 5 years and we have been waiting for this day for some time now. I really just wanted this day to be about us and she seems to want to steal the spotlight. *end rant*

Also, one of my friends and I have had a BIG falling out. I work with her and she got angry at me one day at our office and told me I should quit my job and used some pretty harsh words. We have talked very little since. She is only a personal attendant and I thought about telling her I think its best she wasn’t part of the “bridal party” but it’s an awkward situation and we still work together.

Besides these two situations, I am so happy I have the girls I do standing by my side on my wedding day!

Post # 14
Member
8593 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I have 2 MOH and 3 other BM.  No regrets so far!  Mine are pretty great.  Lived with 3 of them for an extensive period of time (5-6 years?) and for almost all of them we have been friends for over 10 years.  Plus they’re all friends themselves so there isn’t any drama.  FI has his 3 brothers.

I think people should choose the people they want standing up there with them and who they couldn’t imagine not getting ready for the day with.  Definitely don’t add exra people to meet a certain number.

Post # 15
Member
81 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Is it wrong to say slightly?

 

I have 3 bridesmaids and one M(atron)OH. I only slightly regret one bridesmaids because she just didn’t seem too happy about me marrying anyways. There was no “congratulations” when I got engaged. No “I’m happy for you” either. But oh well, the day’s past now/

Post # 16
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I know it’s really early for me to have regrets – but I do.  I’m thrilled with the two people I picked (my sister and my best friend since high school).  However I told FI he could do whatever he wanted with his bridal party and I’m beginning to regret that.  He has so far asked 5 people to be on his side – his brother and sister and three of his best female friends.  Everyone is crazy spread out, with his friends being from Washington State, Chicago, and one where we live and his siblings both living up in New England. 

I feel a little awkward because I have to coordinate with his female groomswomen about what they are going to wear and hair and make-up etc.  Don’t get me wrong, I really like all of these women, but they’re his friends, not mine; so it’s tricky to coordinate with them without feeling like I’m going to ruffle feathers.  (FI and I decided together that all the women will wear the same thing and while he gets a say – he doesn’t have very strong opinions about dresses and flowers).  In addition, my family thinks its really weird for him to have female attendants and while I’m happy to defend him, I sort of wish I didn’t have to…

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