Post # 1
I’m super curious — what are some specific things your bridesmaids are doing for your wedding? (outside of the shower/bachelorette parties) I’m really wondering if yours are doing specific tasks for you? I haven’t asked mine to do anything except two did come with me and my mom once to try on dresses. The others are totally willing to talk to me about the wedding and listen to any concerns/exciting things that come up — but none of them have actually "done" anything for me. I think it’s pretty typical, but I was just curious if anyone had bridesmaids that were actually doing things for them!
Post # 3
Not really. My MoH is helping out a bit with making the place cards, she and a few BMs stuffed the envelopes with me (I paid them with chinese food and prosecco ) and the standard stuff like dress shopping, shower, etc. If I need help, I ask, otherwise they just support me like a normal friend!
Oh, they are making our JUST MARRIED sign and are working on a surprise, but wont say what it is…
Post # 4
My BMs have done NOTHING for the wedding so far. At this point, I am just hoping they show up for the rehearsal and the wedding!
Post # 5
I haven’t really asked anything of them, but my one BM, who’s an amazing graphic designer, volunteered to design our wedding invitations, programs and menu cards for free. We just got them back from the printer, and she did an amazing job.
My sister (my MOH) lives out of state, so it’s hard for us to do wedding things together. But when she was here visiting a weekend ago, she helped assemble the invitations.
Overall, my girls are just there for me to talk to. I have one BM in particular who’s always willing to listen and give advice.
Post # 6
They’re not doing a lot. MOH is doing the most, but really her main two responsibilities are throwing my shower and addressing the envelopes. She will also assist with make-up on the day. My one BM is flying in from Phoenix, so there’s not a lot she can do. My other BM is my sister. She will be picking up our cupcakes and helping with my hair.
I haven’t really asked them to do anything, so I don’t want them to come across as slackers. We’re having a small wedding, so there isn’t a ton of stuff for them to do anyway.
Post # 7
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
Not specifically. When I’m doing wedding-related tasks that I need help with or that I think they might enjoy, I shoot an email inviting anyone who wants to come (in as low a pressure way as possible). I’ll probably ask one of them (the one with nice handwriting!) to help me address envelopes and write out placecards when the time comes, and I’ve invited them all to come along for dress shopping (mine and theirs), but they’ll be buying theirs online so they don’t have to come out unless they want input in the selection.
Most of them are helping MOH with the shower and BP, but I don’t want to ask them to do anything else, really. I feel like that’s enough. 🙂
Post # 8
My MOH went dress shopping with me and is my personal therapist for when I get stressed, she even offered me some of her xanex, lol (I didn’t take it!!!). She did a WONDERFUL job planning my shower with my parents and she is planning my batchelorette party. My Jr. Bridesmaid came dress shopping with me and picked out the most sparkly dresses she could find, then told me "Aunt Daisy you’re SO boring!!" she’s 8 🙂
They rest of my BMs pretty much suck. Two of them are 3000 miles away so I really don’t expect them to do anything but the rest are nearby and haven’t really done anything. I’ve tried e-mailing them for advice/input and I don’t really get much back. I guess thats what I get for choosing busy people with small kids.
Sorry, I’m still just a little annoyed that no one helped my MOH with the shower.
Post # 9
My MOH works all the time, so she was pretty limited to what she could do. She attended the personal shower/bachelorette party and helped out the day before and the morning of doing finishing touches on decorating and icing cupcakes. She also took care of hair for me, herself, and the other two bridesmaids.
The second bridesmaid took over for everything, and she was AWESOME! She always asked what she could do and made it down to 2 showers thrown by other people and coordinated/planned/executed my personal shower (all while living 3ish hours away). She went to my first dress fitting and came to stay with me the week before the wedding. We made a list and she was the calm one making sure I got everything done and keeping me from stressing out (too much). She helped do all the set up and tear down and called me the day after we got back to make sure we didn’t need anything.
The third bridesmaid is a single mom, so she has quite a bit on her plate already! She attended the two showers that were in her hometown (and our event location) and helped with the personal shower. She helped some with the set-up, but due to having to find childcare or bring the little darling (seriously, the child is the cutest thing ever) along, it was usually just for short periods of time. (Which was totally fine.) She also called soon after we got back to see how things went and check in.
My girls were amazing. They kept me calm, and we shared so many laughs. I can’t thank them enough!
Post # 10
My MOH (sister) and a bmaid tagged along dress shopping once, but that’s about it. I know one reallllllly wants to organize the bachelorette party. My MOH is making the favors, since she is the only one in the fam that knows how.
Post # 11
My BM threw and attended my shower and Bachelorette party. My sister was the MOH and she did SO much for/with me–hosted the RD at her house, made our bouquets, helped assemble favors and centerpieces. My other BM were pretty helpful on the day of the wedding–one made boutonnieres! I found that if I asked them to do specific tasks, they would, but I honestly didn’t need that much extra help. My mom and sis helped me with most everything I needed.
Post # 12
Ok. So mine aren’t the only ones who aren’t "doing" much … and I’m totally fine with it. I just wanted to make sure I wasnt the only one. I think they will become more helpful when we get closer to the date with little things like addressing envelopes and seating cards. I think you’re right – Jessie – that you have to ask them to do specific tasks rather then expect them to know what you need. I know everyone of them is doing great things in regards to my shower & bachelorette, so I know that won’t dissappoint!
Thanks ladies, always good to find out you aren’t alone in a situation!
Post # 13
I can honestly say that my bridesmaids heaven’t done ANYTHING!!! The only thing they have done is throw me a REALLY crappy bachelorette party, that I wish never happened!!! Three out of four of my bridesmiads live out of state, so I guess I can’t blame them too much. I do have ONE bridesmaid who helped my mom with the shower along with her mom (my aunt). Plus, she and I talk every day and she has been a GREAT source of support to me.
I hope that other bride’s bridesmaids are better than mine!!!!
Post # 14
Well, my MOH (my sister) could give a crap about any of this. I can barely get her to answer an email about wedding stuff – an EMAIL! She won’t answer the phone – already tried that. I have serious regrets even asking her. A random friend has decided to throw me a bachelorette party since my sister obviously could care less about anything. One BM is awesome – she has gone dress shoppng with me, offered to help, given suggestions, is willing to do anything and everything, and is helping plan the bach. party. My other BM is in another state, but even so, has decided that she’s only showing up the day of the wedding, and refuses to wear the dress I’ve picked out. I need to oust her, but I keep chickening out. I’d like to oust my sister too, but since I already only have three family members, I don’t want to make things uncomfortable on the family side. But it’s seriously disappointing that my sister of all people doesn’t even ask how things are going or show any interest at all.
Post # 15
My MOH lives in a different city then me so it is hard. If I ask her to do something she will but I haven’t asked much. She is throwing my bachlorette party and throwing my shower (I’m basically giving her directions). She will do a great job with it I’m sure. She is young, only 21, and stil in school so it makes it harder. My mother and wedding planner (and myself) have it all under control…and I can be a bit control freaky about certain aspects so it is fine.
Post # 16
My MOH is more therapist right now than anything else. I bounce ideas off her, rant, vent, etc. We’re both pretty busy people, so getting together is tough. Our next date is to shopp for jewlery, lacy underthings, and to put the dress and the accessories togehter to see how my vision is coming along.
Other than that, I won’t need much help until the day, of. She will be responsible for making sure I eat, and opening the champagne while I get ready. I love her madly.