Post # 1
So the many “how do you know you’re ready” for a baby threads makes me wonder.
In your situation what are your savings graces that makes having a baby possible for you? Whether it was planned or not?
Siblings/friends with hand me downs for big ticket items like car seats, strollers, etc.
Very generous family gifts.
ILs/parents nearby who will watch baby for you?
A husband who is completely on board with you to tackle the rough time ahead?
What is it for you and your husband/FI/BF?
Post # 3
@regberadaisy: For us, I can say that I can’t believe how generous our familes are being. It’s unreal. And every time I thank them, or try to say that maybe it’s too much, they say “We just can’t wait to meet her!”
Also, my husband has been so wonderful, and he is completely on board. He is calm where I am not, and he has stepped up so much to help me, that I can see the forest through the trees, so to speak. And as much as it sounds not quite the same, when we got our dog, he got up every time during the middle of the night with him, though he works and I don’t. Voluntarily. With no grumbling. And if he can do that for our dog, I can’t hardly imagine what he will do for our daughter, who he is so incredibly excited for.
Post # 4
For us it is our super-cheap 3-bedroom apartment. We got such a good deal on rent that we have enough left over to cover the cost of very high quality daycare that makes me feel good about being a working mom.
Post # 5
A supportive husband, a nice and affordable apartment in a super safe neighborhood, supportive family.
Post # 6
Honestly, the military.
Our insurance is amazing and we pay nothing out of pocket, this will include zero charge for the birth. They give us access to an awesome support system including free birthing and breastfeeding classes. The military mom groups and the other wives in DHs shop are awesome, they are super supportive and we’ve gotten lots of things from them, whether it be advice, comfort, or free baby stuff. Living overseas, we get allowances not only to pay our rent but also for our bills and utilities, which allows us to save a lot more than we would be able to normally.
Seriously, for all the bad things that go along with dealing with the military, there is good also.
Post # 7
We’re not planning on TTC until next year, but for us it’ll be that we are big time savers and the fact that we currently live well below our means. We dont really worry about bills and spending (except that we’re frugal as hell so we dont really spend much anyways), and are able to max out our 401ks and Roth each year and have savings. So we figure if it ever really gets tight, we can just reduce the retirement contributions to have more cash in hand each year. We’re also really hoping my mom will be able to baby sit for us while I continue to work full time, or if that’s too much for her, that I’ll be able to transition to part time at my job. And of course having insurance as well… its a 4k deductible, unfortunately a far cry from free, but that is manageable and it’s nice to know there’s is a cap and I won’t be stuck with hospital bills upwards of 10k+.
Post # 8
we rent a great place from my in-laws, which will allow us to afford for me to stay home!
Post # 9
**for us, we both have parents who live less than 12 miles away, so daycare is taken care of.
**I am the manager at my job, so I can write my own schedule based around my DH’s availability and our family’s availability to watch the babe.
**I have TONS of friends with kiddos who handed down big ticket items to me. So far I have a nursery full of stuff: an amazing bath tub, a swing, a vintage dresser, a changing table, a bouncy seat, and a baby bjorn…I did not have to pay for a single item!
**Hubby works for company who gives 7 weeks PAID bonding leave for dads.
Post # 10
We aren’t TTC yet, but what made us okay with our TTC timeline (next summer!) is that our house is paid off, so we know we will always have a place to stay, no matter how tough the unknown future could be. Obviously that is assuming we can always pay our property taxes, utilities, insurance, but it makes us feel a LOT better.
Also, we know we’ll do pretty well on the hand-me-downs. My mom has already given us a top-notch hand-me-down stroller (from when my sister was little…she is just 7) and lots of clothes if we have a girl. If we have a boy we’ll be fine too. FI’s step-sibs have girls and boys of all ages.
I also know that my mom will be rather generous because…well she loves babies. 🙂 And it would be her first grand-child.
And knowing that Fiance is in-demand in his current field is a HUGE factor for us. He had 3 job offers two months ago, and chose his favorite, and took the other one on “per-diem.” So he works there about one day a week.
Post # 11
My husband was a single father of a 1 year old when we met. Knowing that I have this wonderful man by my side makes it totally possible to have more children. I know that I will have the best support.
We also have tons of family members. We have very rarely ever had to get a sitter beyond a family member.
Post # 12
we aren’t ttc yet, but I know my parents will be incredibly supportive and generous with their time because I see how they are for my niece, and I know they’ll be more than willing to do the same for their future grandchildren. we’ll probably do well on hand me downs as well–bro and sil are hoping for another kid, but they’ll send us a lot of stuff assuming they have their second child before we have our first.
also, our current apartment is big enough for a nursery–we found a really big (3 teeny bedrooms plus living and dining rooms) but still affordable place last year. it was an amazing deal!
also i’m in grad school and will be able to take some time off without it being too big of a deal. my schedule will be a lot more flexible than if i was accountable to a boss or a strict 9-5 workday. and dh works from home, so has some flexibility too.
Post # 13
Were just TTC, not expecting yet, but let me tell you we wouldn’t even deam of becoming pregnant if it weren’t or our AWESOME MEDICAL INSURANCE! It covers everything and is excepted everywhere and I thank God for it.
Post # 14
We are still TTC, but it’s all the way my wonderful, amazing, beautiful Darling Husband. He, first of all, is the provider. I work, but he’s a hefty 75% of our income. And I’m so proud of how he always advances himself to go even further, to climb higher. Always saying it’s for our family. Not only is he my saving grace for actually having a baby one day, he’s my saving grace in the perilous, exhausting, heart-breaking TTC process. There’s nothing he wouldn’t and hasn’t done for me. For us. To try to have a baby. Hopefully one day soon, it’ll work out. And I know when it does, that his amazing-ness while TTC, is going to be tenfold when he has our baby in his arms. Sometimes I think I don’t deserve him. But I’m certainly glad he thinks I do:)
Post # 15
That I’m able to stay home. It’s a wonderful gift, second only to the gift that is my daughter.
That my husband is such a “family man.” A dad’s relationship with his daughter is truly a special one, and I love to see how he falls in love with her a little more every day.
Post # 16
While my partner and I are so not ready for a baby just yet (but have discussed what would happen if an oops pregnancy were to happen), I think already living in a house with enough room for a baby is the most important saving grace we have. If we lived in a one bedroom apartment, I would be so stressed (even more so!), but we have enough room to easily add a baby to the mix. Also, we live within an hour of all of our parents which is extremely helpful. We know if I were to get pregnant, I’d be spending my last trimester on bed rest (at the very least) so being so close to everyone is extremely beneficial. I already have a fantastic team of doctors so that is also something that is helpful and already in our court. We have a great team of supportive and wonderful friends, also. While I can not expect these people to raise our kid, I know that we have plenty of people would help us.