Post # 1
Hi bees with babies 🙂
I do not very often spend time with people who have babies. Soon I will be meeting up with a friend and her newborn. I of course want to show interest but not really sure how to make baby-related conversation… So I ask you bees: what questions do you love to be asked about your newborn? What do you hate to be asked, or what questions do you find annoying?
Post # 3
don’t have a baby but from what I’ve heard from my friends and mom:
-Don’t compare the baby to other babies (ie. Oh Josh’s baby was so much chubbier/thinner/longer/etc.)
-Don’t comment on the mom’s weight, good or bad (OMG you lost so much weight, how did you do it?) unless you are very very close to them. I might say that to my best friend but no one else
-Don’t ask about meeting milestones. They go through all that with the Pediatrician. If they are proud, generally they will tell you. If you ask and their child isn’t meeting a mileston, then you will risk offending them. (ie. Can timmy sit up/crawl/lift his head?)
Had more when I started typing, but can’t remember.
Post # 4
I feel like a lot of topics can be good/bad depending on that particular baby!
For example, I hate to be asked if I’m breastfeeding. I started formula feeding at 5/6 weeks old and felt guilt for awhile. When I said I was formula feeding I felt judged. Though, if a woman is a breastfeeding all-star or SUPER comfortable in her decision to formula feed, I bet she’d love to talk about it.
On the other hand, I love when people ask me how my baby sleeps because she’s a sleeping all-star (most of the time!). This is probably a safe topic, because even if the baby isn’t a good sleeper, it’s not a topic that causes mommy-wars/guilt.
Is she staying at home? Going back to work? If she’s going back to work you can ask about when she’s going back, how does she feel about it, etc.
Post # 5
Your best bet is to be generally complimentary and vaguely interested, ie, “s/he is such a sweetheart! And you look great! So tell me, how’s life as a new mom?” More than likely, the new mom is excited to see YOU because you’re her tether to the outside world, so I wouldn’t worry that much about propelling baby conversation yourself. Let her be the guide when it comes to that. You can be responsible for the new beaus, old friends, that crazy person at work, movies/books/sports/Hollywood gossip, etc. etc part of the conversation.