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Hhhhmmmmm- could you give them a bouqet or a corsage to indicate they are with the wedding party? Are you going to have them dress the same? With those two things I am sure people would at least get that they were special in some way. Though, I guess I am not that helpful considering those are pretty traditional bridemaid customs and I am sure you have already thought of them.
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Miss Lovebug did the same thing and she gave her best friends an "All Access" pass to the room that she got ready in:
http://www.weddingbee.com/2008/01/25/backstage-bridal-passes/
I'm also thinking that they could be there while you were getting ready (perhaps even get their hair or makeup done too) and help plan your bridal shower/bachelorette with your MOH. I think joyful's idea is a good one too!
i'm really in the dark on your wedding customs....so some of these suggestions may not work at all...
i like the idea of giving them special flowers to either wear or hold.
would it be possible for them to walk down the aisle before you? would there be an appropriate moment for that?
wearing similiar coordinating outfits would be great. they could help you get ready on the day of and plan a shower for you as suggested above......
as for things you could get them to do to help you plan things?
what about invitations? i'm gonna guess you will have a larger wedding and thats a lot of invitations to stuff, addresss, apply stamps to.
favors? could they help you prepare those? perhaps help them pass them out at your reception.
allow them to distribute the programs at your ceremony if you will have one.....and of course give them a shout out on the programs for all to see that these 3 ladies are really special to you.....
hope something above helped! Good Luck!
I had some "honorary" bridesmaids at my wedding, and they served essentially as ushers. I didn't ask them to dress alike, but gave them all wrist corsages to show they were with the wedding party.
They greeted guests as they came in, and helped direct people to the ceremony, and to the reception area afterwards.
If you're having a shower/bachelorette, you can ask your sisters to include your honoraries in the planning. Also, you can ask the honoraries to put together your emergency kit, and activity kits for the kids, if you have any attending.
I have "honorary" bridesmaids -- my fiance's two sisters! (my brother is an honorary groomsman). They are wearing a color that is complimentary to the bridesmaids color -- bridesmaids are wearing "pool", his sisters are wearing "oasis". My brother will wear an oasis tie. I also got them corsages to wear and a boutinere (sp) for my brother. They are in charge of the guest table, the seating cards, and taking all gifts home after the wedding.
thank you all for your comments they've definitly helped...please feel free to keep contributing to this, your ideas are great and the more, the merrier!
Dalooleh
I don't think this is still relevant, since I think you've already gotten married, but we're in a somewhat similar situation, in the sense that our only "bridal party" consists of his 7 year old niece and my 2 year old niece. We couldn't narrow it down from 7 on each side, which was WAY bigger than what we wanted.
That being said, my three closest girlfriends, whom I couldn't imagine planning this without, are all wearing black dresses of their choosing to the wedding. They'll be there from the beginning to the bitter end helping me, and that way, they can be recognized for the outstanding work they've helped me with in planning this shindig, as well as look awesome for some quick photo ops with my girls. They still get to feel special even though they're not part of the ceremony itself.
huntersvilleweddingphotographer_elizab.jpg (53.5 KB, 37 downloads) 2 years old hickoryweddingphotographer_lorahawn_we.jpg (18.2 KB, 35 downloads) 2 years old gastoniaweddingphotographer_jenniferhe.jpg (30.1 KB, 34 downloads) 2 years old 
Honorary bridesmaids or housemaids could come to your suite where you are getting ready and spend time with you in the morning before the wedding. Or you could plan a little casual brunch or lunch with the honorary bridesmaids/housemaids. You could also give them corsages or pinned flowers to differentiate them if you aren't asking them to wear a particular dress for you.
I did notice that you said you asked these girls to be bridesmaids. Will they be standing up with you? Technically I don't think that bridesmaids need to DO anything... mine are far away and aren't helping with anything other than the shower and bachelorette party. They will just support me on my wedding day & moving forward in my marriage!
I think that it's great that you are involving your friends.
You could consider having them over before the wedding at your girls night. They could get pampered with you the day before and hang out with you pre-wedding. Instead of adding flowers (which are scary expensive) you could mention in your program that you are thankful to your friends and list them by name.
Just a couple ideas.
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Hi everyone!!
I'm quite excited to write my first post since I've been reading wedding bee for many months and now, 4 months to my wedding, I finally get to participate in the site. Anyway my question is this:
I am Arab, and due to tradition we dont usually have too many bridesmaids its usually just one maid of honor, a sister (in my case, my 2 sisters) and a best man (brother of the groom). But I wanted to honor my 3 best friends too so I asked them to be my bridesmaids. Problem is, I don't know what they can do! My parents/family aren't too aware of the bridesmaids tradition and when informed of the fact that the bridesmaids help me plan things my family said "isn't that what your sisters will do? Include them" sooooo my issue is: I'm barely asking my sisters to do things, so what would I ask my bridesmaids to do? Bear in mind that my sisters and bridesmaids are all located around the world, only 1 of my friends is here.
The other question is more important to me: how do I "label" my bridesmaids/sisters during the wedding? I thought of some cheesy things like having them wear a Miss America-like sash that reads their position but they've already vetoed that! :) So any other way to note who they are, and give them some shine at the wedding without *ahem* taking too much away from the bride ;)
Thanks Bees!! Cant wait to hear your suggestions.
Dalooleh