What do you all think about this?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Frankly, I would be insulted. I have never understood plans to propose at some point. If you know you will propose, propose now. A woman should not be made to ‘wait’ like this. She is not a puppy waiting for a treat. Dangling a promise without actually making it is wrong. I would not take that. I never have. 

Post # 3
Member
207 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

My SO put this into perspective for me and apracticalwedding.com confirmed with this article: http://apracticalwedding.com/2011/09/he-wants-to-marry-you-engagement/ 

Sometimes our men are truly ready to make the commitment, but they want to be able to take their time to scheme and plan.  Right or wrong, the proposal is often the man’s big moment, and society tells them that it has to be perfect.  My boyfriend prescribes to that school of thought, and has been planning the proposal for months now.

Maybe her boyfriend thinks similarly, but is also reasonable enough to realize that a baby would create a new timeline and his schemes would be the least important thing?

Post # 4
Member
1287 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Aklove:  My FI, while were dating, and having the ‘what IF I got accidently pregnant while in this relationship’ conversation said the same thing.  I think a lot of men WOULD think along the same lines, under the circumstances that they are with the person they want to marry, so in the event a pregnancy were to occur, they would propose.  However, I told my FI (SO at that time) that I would not want him to propose only because I was pregnant, but rather when he was ready to do it!!  A baby on the way does not mean I NEED a ring on my finger…

If your friend wants a proposal, then a marriage, then a baby – then, she needs to take care of her body, and prevent it, rather than ‘worrying’ or wondering that IF she got preggo, and he proposed immediately that he was doing it for the wrong reasons?!  

Beyond that, if she wants him to propose sooner rather than later, so that they can move on in their lives together, she needs to vocalize that desire with him, and hopefully he is on the same page!

 

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