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A "plus 1" to me means someone I've never met/someone who I have no connection with or someone's gf/bf. The last one has caused some upset, but I never expected an invite to my FI's friends weddings before we were engaged. I have no obligation to that person, unless we're close or they're very serious. My cousin made a huge fuss about me inviting her BF, I said "well if you're still together then fine" She has a bad track record & they've broken up since the huge uproar she caused!
I totally agree with you that serious couples (married or engaged) are considered a social unit! You cannot invite one without the other. It's actually an insult to invite a guest & not invite the person they are married to!
A +1 is a random stranger you have never met before and will never see again.
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Miss Stiletto's recent post and the comments after it got me thinking -- it seems like a lot of people consider the spouse or fiance of a friend to be a +1. This really surprised me, since I've always thought that those people were a social unit and I'd never consider inviting someone who is married, engaged, or in a serious relationship without their other half. We also identified all spouses/fiances/partners by name on the invitations. To me, a +1 is the same as "and guest," meaning that I don't know the identity of the person my friend would be bringing but am allowing them to bring a guest of their choice.
Does anyone else think this way, or am I in the minority? I guess I was just pretty shocked to hear people referring to spouses, especially, as +1s.