Post # 1
What do you do around other men… you know the attractive ones?
There’s this security guard that works in my building. Yeah, he’s attractive. Everytime I see him I always think to myself how attractive he is. I only talk to him if I have to. (like buiding related questions) Otherwise, I acknowlegde that he’s there and sometimes give him a little smile and continue on to whatever I was doing. I definitely don’t think of him throughout the day or obsess about him. (I’m married and happily married.) He only pops in my head when I see him. In other words, I turn into the shy little girl back in high school. lol
I know that there’s nothing wrong with being attracted to other men but what do you do?
I do have co-workers that are attractive that I have to work regularly with but I think it’s different because I know them and their wives and I don’t have any feelings towards them. Maybe I’m just being silly about this one particular guy.
Just curious on what everyone else does.
Post # 3
I try not to stare too hard, but usually I just think wow what a good looking guy..sometimes ill smile sometimes I dont.. but thats how I am with everyone attractive or not….and then just go on with my life :).
Post # 5
I usually try and focus on NOT staring too hard as well.. but then I probably end up looking a bit off in doing so 😛
Post # 6
I usually just acknowledge to myself that the person is attractive and stay cordial… Hubby and I dont find it akward that we are attracted to other people… we often talk about it… he’s in the nursing field and surrounded by women and he’ll tell me “the new nurse is nice looking” or if I’ll tell him “that security gaurd is built really nice” it’s nice to have eye candy at work as long as that is all it is…
Post # 7
If I see an attractive guy and think of how better looking my FI is (opinion, of course!) and think of how lucky I am to be with him!
Post # 8
RingPup i totally agree. that’s how i feel. i see attractive guys but, none of them compare to how physically attracted i am to my fiance.
Post # 9
Nothing really? I treat them as if I would any other guy.
Post # 10
I think it’s perfectly normal and healthy to find other people attractive. As my married friend said once, “I’m married, not blind!” Of course, it’s not always fun to acknowledge that your SO finds other people attractive as well, but as long as it doesn’t go beyond a simple acknowledgement, no harm no foul. However, I don’t think it’s good to start fantasizing about attractive people you work with, for example. I feel that kind of opens the door to taking the attraction from simply noticing someone else is attractive to becoming tempted to act on that attraction.
Post # 11
Seven years ago, I was married, though not so happily. There was also an attractive security guard at my work I kept noticing.
Today, I’m happily married to the attractive security guard (though he has moved onto a bigger and better career since then).
This is not what I would recommend to you obviously, but it is my true story
Post # 12
I treat them normally although I do notice that I have a more flirty banter than with the one’s that aren’t so cute.
Post # 13
@meliss: haha! That’s awesome. lol
I don’t really think much of anything. I may think, “Oh, he’s good looking” for about 2 seconds, and then I move on.
Post # 14
Actually, I just met someone who I found very attractive the other day and it is my Fiance’s apprentice. He talks about him all the time because he works with him. So when I finally met this guy I instantly found him very attractive. I didn’t say anything just “nice to meet you” and that was it. I was a bit more quiet than usual…I found him attractive and didn’t want to make it noticable. I didn’t let on anything to my Fiance I just kept it to myself. See for me, I’ve always been a face girl. I never cared about whether a guy is ripped or not. With my fiance, he’s got a fabulous body, he’s hugely tall, not ripped, but he’s not out of shape either and an ass that can sink a ship! I’ve never been an ass girl but with my guy I soooo am! He’s got a nice face, sometimes it looks gorgeous in the proper lighting. You see my Fiance has natural shadows and bone structure that at times together do NOTHING for him and in some lights the shadows are worse and he doesn’t look good at all because the illusion from the shadows are that his face is not symmetrical and that his nose is bigger than it is and his eyes are smaller than they are. Oh yes and he loves his hair almost buzz short…I have NEVER liked buzz cut hair and find it incredibly unflattering on him. Anyway, when he is in good lighting he’s perfectly symmetrical and incredibly gorgeous. His blue eyes look big and blue and his nose is in porportion to the rest of his face. Or sometimes a quick fix is just sunglasses he puts on his SG’s and I’m all over him he looks so awesome. But his friend, when I met him has no weird shadows, and has a perfectly symmetrical face and a nice smile complete with straight white teeth (something my fiance doesn’t have) and those are the things I found instantly attractive about this guy.
Post # 15
HOWEVER what my fiance doesn’t always have in appearance he more than makes up with in his personality. No one loves me like he does, no one makes me laugh like he does, no one gives the tender hugs like he does, and no one refuses to leave for work in the morning without faithfully kissing me goodbye and telling me he loves me – like he does 🙂 Not to mention looks fade as we get older so I know it’s not the be all and all and while I love my Fiance more than anything, I will still appreciate good craftsmenship on God’s part 🙂 Besides people are attracted to things that are symmetrical, that fit, that go together so it’s normal. As long as my fiance still has these shadow issues and things like that, whenever I see someone who doesn’t and who has been my level of hotness in the past will continue to still be noticable to me. We cannot control who we find attractive, it’s a chemical response….it’s acting on it that we can control. An attractive looking man is no reason to second guess my Fiance by any means. I know that my fiance will make a great husband an excellent father and he’ll be with me until the day I die….there’s no substitution for that