What do you do if you DON'T have an orgasm?

posted 3 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: What do you usually do if you have sex but don't orgasm?
    Fake it : (41 votes)
    13 %
    Not tell my partner, but not fake it either : (88 votes)
    28 %
    Tell my partner, but be OK with not having an orgasm : (103 votes)
    32 %
    Tell my partner, and have him give me an orgasm a different way : (67 votes)
    21 %
    This never happens to me. I always have orgasms. : (19 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    681 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @pictureaccount:  I tell him it isn’t working whatever way we’re going about it and we change it  up or just concede, but rarely. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    1416 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @pictureaccount:  nothing. i dont have to O to enjoy it and i most definitely would not fake it.  

    Post # 5
    Member
    2766 posts
    Sugar bee

    I almost never orgasm during intercourse, so it’s something I’m used to. Sometimes we’ll use a vibrator so that I can orgasm, but otherwise I just enjoy the sensations and experience of sex and get off before/after in other ways 🙂

    Post # 7
    Member
    306 posts
    Helper bee

    I would choose “other”. He can tell when I have an orgasm and he will usually ask if there is something he can do for me. I don’t really mind one way or the other if I have one.

    Post # 8
    Member
    2661 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    I really only orgasm if he uses his hands, and usually he’ll do that during foreplay. So I get off before sex, and he’ll get off during sex. It’s totally fine with me. I need prolonged stimulation at the same pace and pressure, which is difficult to do during sex.

    ETA: if we don’t do much for foreplay and I don’t orgasm at all, that’s fine with me also. I really enjoy what we do, regardless of whether or not I orgasm. It still feels amazing!

    Post # 9
    Member
    3007 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @FisherQueen:  Ditto. DH can tell if I haven’t and I don’t feel like faking it. There’s certain things that just don’t get it done that he likes and I’m ok with him getting the enjoyment and me passing on an O for one day.

    Post # 10
    Member
    9137 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    @pictureaccount:  Depends on the situation and how tired we are.  If we’re tired we both give up and go to sleep.  If we’re not tired we try another way.

    Post # 11
    Member
    4413 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @MissCalifornia:  ditto — I have to do it manually (no G-spot) so I’d say I more often than not just enjoy the sex without bothering to make myself O. Too much work, haha. I’m kind of glad — I feel like it would stress me out a little if we had to either keep having sex til I O’d every time (even if I was over it, haha) or disappoint my husband!

    Post # 12
    Member
    4867 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @pineapplez17:  +, this is me exactly. I could never orgasm during sex, totally fine with it getting taken care of other ways.

    Post # 13
    Member
    3866 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I very rarely O during sex – and even when I do, it’s usually a small one – but I don’t fake it either. DH will usually bring me to an O with his fingers or mouth during foreplay or, occasionally, after sex. Works for me & we both enjoy ourselves!

    Post # 14
    Member
    2153 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I don’t orgasm easily from sex, and I know whether or not it’s gonna happen. So I just tell him it’s not gonna happen and then he’ll just give me oral. He always makes sure I orgasm.

    Post # 15
    Member
    3338 posts
    Sugar bee

    I fake it. But not for him, for myself 🙂 I find that faking it gets me worked up and sometimes does the job. I can kind of trick my body into it.. kinda 🙂 hehe Plus I am a little loud so if I dont, my SO gets a little weirded out. But he knows that I sometimes fake it. But he also knows that I am always satisfied 🙂 

    Post # 16
    Member
    2923 posts
    Sugar bee

    Nothing. I don’t orgasm that way, and like a PP, I don’t fake it or necessarily feel the need to do anything about it since sex is still enjoyable.

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