Post # 1
This may seem like a weird question, but I’m just curious if anyone else has this same issue. DH has a friend who still lives at home so he loves to come over here and hang out. That’s fine with me, the entire basement is a DH’s domain, with a rec room, mini bar, full bath, etc. This happens once, sometimes twice a week.
The thing is, the friend’s GF comes over after work too, and she’ll come talk to me while the boys watch sports or play video games downstairs. Sometimes it’s fine, I’ll just sit and crochet or go out and have a cig with her, but sometimes I just want to watch Fa-la-la-la-Lifetime by myself in our guest bedroom. Does this make me a bad hostess if I didn’t invite them over? I always make sure we have food and sodas if I know people are coming over, but I don’t generally stay downstairs with them–they come over to watch hockey or MMA stuff, neither of which I enjoy. The friend and his GF also drink like fishes and smoke a cig every 20 minutes or so in the yard. Not really my cup of tea.
In any case, just wondering what other people do in this circumstance.
Post # 3
depends. if its just the guys i leave them to it. if a wife/gf comes over i normally hang out too and we all hang together. but i dont feel guilty about going to bed earlyish if they have a late one (esp now as im pregnant and cant drink or smoke)
i have actively discouraged DH from invited friends as couples if i wanted alone time and didnt feel sociable – and asked him just to invite his friend for guy time
Post # 4
@newname_99: That’s a good idea–I need to say something to him about it, I guess. Sometimes I feel like the GF comes over regardless since it’s an informal kind of thing–if I’ve got the door closed it’s not like she knocks and bothers me. I think if the friend didn’t live at home it would happen less…
Post # 5
Same thing! I hang out for a while, but then I leave them to their guy time.
Post # 6
all of the above.
depending on the friend.
depending on what they are doing
how long they are staying
what i have planned to do etc.
Post # 7
@MrsLongcoatPeacoat: I can’t say I have this problem. FIs friends are all friends with me and I don’t think they have any interests that I’m meh about partaking in. The only exception being PC gaming because I suck at it, in which case I can always get their girlfriends (also friends with) to join me for some Friday Bride day or Netflix.
Post # 8
I like video games, UFC, football, etc, so I usually hang out with the guys the whole time.
Post # 9
I cheer, dance, and have a party.
Joking. I would be thrilled if my partner had friends over. Sadly, my partner is a complete misanthrope and has no friends. He says I “don’t count as a separate person, so I’m okay,” but he hates spending more time with other people than he has to. I’m basically the only person he enjoys spending time with. He can tolerate other people in small doses, but that’s it.
Post # 10
I might talk to him about having people over less. I tend to try and be a good host and hang around for the wife/gf. If it happens all the time, it does put you in a difficult position. If the wife/gf is okay with watching what the guys are watching, I think you’re safe to do your own thing for the most part. Maybe just ask if they need anything, and then go have some me-time.
Post # 11
- Wedding: October 2013 - Vine Street Church
Depends on the friends, but when he has his nerd weekends when his friends come over to play D&D and Magic, they sit in the front room at the table and I sit on the couch in the den dicking around on the Internet.
Post # 12
I have no choice but to hang out with them. DH’s friends always bring their SO’s. So I am busy entertaining the SO or we are all entertaining each other.
Post # 13
Depends on who it is and my mood. If Im not up for company he is free to host himself. I have no issues staying in my bed and having me time.
Post # 14
Majority of my husband’s friends are still single. He has one friend that is coming for the weekend and I plan on hanging out with them or chilling on my own when I want to. I guess if he had a girlfriend we’d all hang out together, maybe I’d spend a small amount of time with her on the side. When we have couples over (we had two over this past Friday night), we all hang out together but we do spend some time chatting just the girls and just the guys.
Post # 15
Generally, I crash their brofest and hang with them.
We live in a one-bedroom with an open concept living area. We don’t invite friends over unless we’re both in the mood for company, but when girlfriends do come over, then I peel myself away from what the dudes are doing to chat with her.
I’ve learned to not get attached to FI’s friends’ girlfriends. I feel traumatized by the number girls they go through after making me to entertain and become friends with them!
Post # 16
It depends. If its just the guys, then I make an appearance, and leave. If there are other ladies over, then I feel obligated to entertain