- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
On Wednesday night, my boyfriend and I had another disagreement about our future. He currently is working as a busser in a restaurant and is barely making enough to scrape by. He is working on paying off credit card debt and saving up money. He is also in the process of starting a business and also looking for full-time work.
My lease is up next May and he told me that he wasn’t sure if we could live together when my lease was up. While I knew this was a possibility, hearing it made me rather upset. I went home and then texted him that I was upset. He ended up calling me and we ended up having a fight about the future. I told him basically that I wasn’t going to wait for him forever and that I need reassurance that this is going to happen. I felt like he never took responsibility at all that his actions may be making me insecure and made me feel like it was completely my problem.
So, yesterday, I subconsciously left my phone at my apartment and didn’t bother to tell my Boyfriend or Best Friend that I left it. He knows my work number and can easily call. I didn’t receive anything until 4:45 in my personal email account. I came home to a missed call, voice mail, and three text messages before he went to work at 5:30. I went to a girls night and texted him after when I knew he would have my lunch break. I just said that i was having fun at my girls night and I hope he was having a good day at work and that I was sorry I missed him. I received a text message around 2 this morning saying “love you too” because I didn’t say I love you.
I was so livid yesterday at him. I hate how he doesn’t take any accountability for the way I feel about our relationship and that being insecure is all my fault. I am also very angry that other people far worse off move forward and that if he wanted it bad enough, he would make it happen.
I am planning on telling him that if we do not live together in 2012, then I am moving on. I can handle living together as we move toward marriage but I cannot let him keep putting it off. My Boyfriend or Best Friend does not handle ultimatims well and I need to know how to handle it. I also feel like, in the last couple days, I have detached myself from the relationship a little. How do you other ladies handle knowing there’s an ultimatim on the line but still be happy and in love?