Post # 1
Okay I am thinking about skipping the Best Man and MOH toasts during the reception. Personally I think they are a bit awkward and you never know how long they will go on. Do people really care to listen to them? My plan instead is to have them write whatever they would have said (or something similar) and include it as part of the wedding program for guests to read while they are waiting for the ceremony to start. My MOH is pretty shy about public speaking and the Best Man is not the most put together person in the world.
SO… good idea? or bad?
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
@newbee2013: If I was a MOH, I would be looking forward to giving that speech to you and your hubby on your wedding day. Part of a great speech is the reactions, both the reaction of the couple and the reaction of the audience. A funny storry or touching moment is less prominent without the reactions from the couple or the crowd. Just give your MOH and best man a time limit.
Post # 4
OK I’m biased because in the UK/Australian tradition the speeches are a pretty big deal. But, if the best man and MOH aren’t good at speeches, why not get someone else to do the toasts, e.g. two of the parents?
Post # 5
Just depends I guess… talk to the MOH and BM and ask what they think. My MOH had an anxiety attack when she realized she is “supposed” to give a speech, so we shall see how that goes lol. If they are both shy but still have something nice to say, the program idea seems good. If not, you could just nix it altogether.
Post # 6
Unless they are very good writers who are comfortable with people reading, analyzing, and critiquing what they write, this will be extremely uncomfortable for your MOH and BM. I’m a professional writer and I’d be pretty off put by this.
Post # 7
Oh I love Best Man speeches! They are usually pretty funny! I’ve only been to a few weddings where the MOH spoke as well but I think if it is the norm where you are from she may be a bit hurt that you’ve nixed it. The key to any speeches is to not let them drag on too long (45 minutes at my sisters wedding and it was cocktail so no chairs – ugh) but I would really miss them if they didn’t happen at a wedding.
Post # 8
@newbee2013: I like this idea because I always find speeches soooo boring unless you are close to them they are so boring and I find it hard to stay listening ahhhhhh!!
Post # 9
I love that idea!! If I wasn’t already married, I would have stolen that from you!
Go for it!
Post # 10
- Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas
I know that my FI best men have been planning their speeches for almost a year, and I think they’d be gutted if they didn’t get to deliver that hilarity to everyone.
Ask the BM and MOH what they think, and go from there.
Post # 11
I love this idea!! If I can get FI to agree then I am so totally stealing it lol
Post # 12
Totally fine if your MOH/BM are okay with it. Personally I love hearing toasts though – they’re a must-have for my wedding.
Post # 13
@newbee2013: I think it’s a great idea. As a guest I wouldn’t miss the toasts, honestly.
Post # 14
- Wedding: February 2017 - Seattle, WA
Speaking from the MOH and BM point of view, I think they would totally love not having to give a speech!! Public speaking is a very common fear, and I don’t think anyone would be upset about being let off the hook. Great idea!
Post # 15
Personally, the toasts are my favourite part of the wedding. If your MOH & BM are okay with it though, then why not?
Post # 16
I’m a shy person too, and would never want to give a toast at a wedding. But it would make me equally nervous to write something for the program. Probably in both cases I would pick a poem to read rather than my own words.
I don’t really like listening to toasts at weddings, they are usually OK but not something I would miss. I honestly wouldn’t plan on having any toasts at my wedding if we go the traditional route.