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So DH and I are not planning on TTC this year; we're trying to wait until early 2012. However, I have MAJOR baby fever now. In order to hopefully make the year go by faster, and also to maybe come up with some fun ideas, I want to create a baby bucket list--aka, a list of things I want to do before becoming pregnant/having kids.
I would love to hear from moms, moms-to-be, and people in general about
- Things you wish you had done before getting pregnant/having kids
- Things you're glad you did before getting pregnant/having kids
- Things that you do now that make you glad you don't have a baby right now.
Any and all ideas are welcome :)
We're not even married yet and I'm starting to want kids :(. Here are a few things we need to get out of the way first, though (other than the wedding, lol!)
Okay, my list is kind of short since we'll really be waiting on him to finish school. I'll be interested in hearing other people's responses!
@jo.lee: vacations are definitely a huge one for us as well! I wish we had more time off so we could just knock a bunch of places off our list :/ We are going to do California pre-baby though--no way I'm going to go to CA wine country without being able to drink! :)
I can't imagine having kids any time soon and I'm 27, hehe. I think what it boils down to is that I like being able to do what I want when I want to do it. There are the big things like travel. But I also like being able to read an entire book in one sitting without anyone bothering me, taking off for a long weekend or even a day trip, things like that.
No babies here yet, but here are the things I make sure to appreciate and relish now (b/c I know that TTC will come sooner than I am ready for...):
@septcabride: OMG sushi and brie for sure! I'll have to go on sushi and cheese eating extravaganzas this year. And I definitely a gree with going to the gym whenever--I'm hoping to start pilates this year, which I probably won't have time for post-baby!
@EleanorRigby: I definitely agree with "doing what I want, when I want". I'm trying to be more appreciative of my ability to make my own schedule right now (for the most part, anyway).
Oh good idea!!! We're getting married in June and I have some serious baby fever now!! We're not planning on TTC until late 2012 :(
1. Europe trip (We also would like to be able to enjoy it without the extra cost/energy of kids. FI has never been.)
Ah I can't think of anything else right now except for adorable babies lol. Hopefully other people post and inspire me!
I didn't necessarily do it right before baby, but I did a LOT of traveling right out of undergrad for work, and I'm so glad, because it would be hard with a baby and I think I'd be resentful if I'd never gotten to have that period where I could pick up and go anywhere.
I've done a couple adventure sport-like things, but I wish I'd gone skydiving one last time, or bungee jumping ever, etc. before getting pregnant. Now I feel like even once the baby is born, I'm not sure I'd want to take the risk.
I wish that my husband and I had gone out and socialized and gone on dates with each other more often. We have plenty of togetherness time, but I wish we'd done more crazy-nights-out-with-friends or romantic dinner dates- stuff that will be hard to do after baby.
We did buy a house, so that was nice- especially since now we have a fenced in yard that makes it a lot easier to have a dog and means I worry less about how to wrangle dog + baby.
One other thing I did, and I'm glad I did, is to work on getting into better shape. Getting really into working out several months before getting pregnant made me feel better about myself, and made it a lot easier to keep being at least somewhat active for much of the pregnancy. Plus, I swear workout out helped the nausea.
no brie when pregnant? so sad!
i also have extreme baby fever...but here's our baby bucket list:
things i like about being baby-free:
@Lozza: I was totally expecting people to say things like "sky diving" and "bungee jumping". If I were ever going to do those things, I guess this year would be the time! But I might be too much of a chicken. I also do want to make sure I work out consistently this year--might as well get as close to a six pack as I can before I gain a ton of weight :) But I've also heard that exercising pre-pregnancy/during pregnancy also makes for a leaner baby--aka, they come out more easily. Not sure if that's actually true.
Hilsy85, this is SUCH a great post!!! I have been thinking and feeling the exact same thing. I am 27 now (will be 28 when I get married) and plan on having children around the 30/31 mark. So that is about 2 years to get everything that's left out of my system!
Before I have Children I would like to....
1 - Would love to live and experience living in a few other big cities with my Fiance. I already lived in NYC and Philly. Chicago & San Fran are on my list next!
2 - Travel, Travel, Travel! Going to Europe in the summer. Would love to visit Japan, Thailand, India and Africa.
3. - Finish School
4. - Save up a little more money
5. - Experiences! Such as Hang Gliding, Sky Diving, Snorkeling, Zip Lining. Anything thrilling and somewhat dangerous before I am a mother.
6.-
LAST but not least.. I hate to admit this but I'll be honest haha. I'd like to fly to Amsterdam and experience Mushrooms or any other natural drug with my Fiance. To say we did it and tried it once, and it was a hoot! (lol) And possibly a threesome with a very attractive woman who we will never see again. Haha.. hey I'm just being honest. I want to get everything out of my system before I become the sweet little housewife/mom I plan to be. 
We never got our honeymoon! We didn't go right away because of DH's school schedule, and then ended up finding a house and getting pregnant within 2 months of the wedding.
Lose 20 pounds and run a 10k. It's been my goal for a while, but I was just getting back into running when I got pregnant. I was so exhausted in the first trimester that I gave it up rather quickly.
That's really it though - we are both ready for kids and have a pretty child-friendly lifestyle already.
Lots of brie is made with pasturized milk so I've still been eating the pasturized kind.
Travel, I've traveled a lot but still wish I'd traveled more (though since my husbands side of the family lives out of the country we'll still be traveling, it just seems like it will be very different)
Long date days with my husband. We really enjoy each others company and have had a lot of these but I feel like I'm going to miss them so much.
- backpack through Europe
- live overseas
- boudoir photos (I want to remember what my body was like!)
@PinkMagnolia: ME TOO re :boudoir. I think I'm going to do them this summer for our 1 year anniversary. I want to have them t o look back on--almost more for me than for my hubby, lol.
@troubled: What a relief to hear that about brie! I would miss it so :) And I totally agree re: long dates. We're pretty good about going out just the two of us, but definitely something to keep in mind.
@April_Fools_Bride: We were just talking about how once we have kids, we won't be able to pick up an dmove to a new city. With DH's job, it's pretty unlikely that we'll ever live anywhere else but NYC :( So I guess that's one thing that we'd love to do, but I don't see it being possible. As for travel, just want to throw out there that we went to Africa on our honeymoon and it was beyong amazing, so I highly recommend it!
@mrstilly: I also want to do a 10k this year. I ran my first one in 2009, and I'd like to do at l east one more before babies arrive!
I have major baby fever too.. We "pulled the goalie" 2 cycles ago but the more I think about it the more I think we should just enjoy our first year of marriage and all that the city has to offer before we move to the burbs next winter...
Here are just a few. :)
Vacation, celebrate my 30th Birthday, Enjoy NYC before we move to the burbs next winter, drink all the wine I want, sleep, go to Brunch and not go home until 9pm because we started exploring different areas of the city and shopping, tone my body more...
I have the baby rabies, so I have been making a conscious effort to notice and enjoy everything I can do now, that I might not be able to do when a baby comes along.
Sleeping in on weekends. 9 am is the latest we ever sleep in, but I know that is luxury!
Going out for a night of drinking with friends, without worrying about getting home to a baby or worrying about not drinking too much so that I don't have a hangover while caring for a baby bright and early the next morning!
LONG HOT BATHS.
Reading books whenever I feel like it.
Reading books IN long hot baths!
Vegging in front of the TV after a HARD day at work with a glass of wine.
Eating cereal for dinner if I don't feel like cooking, and not having to worry about anyone (hubs sometimes cooks for himself, and if I had a kid I'd have to make sure he/she had dinner.)
Eating at a nice restaurant spur of the moment- no planning ahead for a babysitter.
Grabbing drinks on the beach with my hubby on a saturday afternoon- it's nice to just SIT without having to entertain a baby.
Sometimes, when lugging in my purse, a briefcase and a ton of grocery bags from the car, I remind myself that I'm lucky I don't have to juggle a baby on top of everything. LOL. Very little thing, but since I have baby fever, I keep reminding myself of everything.
Gym time.
Vacations. The hubs and I have been taking LOTS of trips this year, and every time we go, I remind myself that it is nice to be able to just take off without worrying about kids, leaving them with grandparents or packing a million things to take them with us.
We're not planning on TTC for another 4-5 years, so I don't have much to offer on this... but out of curiosity.. Why is brie bad to eat while you're pregnant? I know why sushi is on the list, for obvious reasons, but I guess I'm out of the loop with brie! I don't eat it anyway, but I'm just curious! :)
@kt23525: I believe it's because it's usually un pasturized, and so can carry bacteria/has live bacteria in it. But apparently, pasturized brie exists--woo hoo!!
I'm already pretty boring so my life hasn't changed much now that I'm pregnant. The only things I really miss are like some people said, certain foods. I'm a huge fan of eggs benedict/runny eggs and lox. But it's only 9 months, I can live without it for that long.
I did have some things I wanted to do, like go to a theme park for a new rollar coaster. But again, that's something that I'll be able to do later on in life, no biggie.
As for vacations, I'm looking forward to taking the kids on vacation with me! My parents always traveled with us, so I feel like I'll do the same.
@kt23525: The brie problem is the same as sushi, and unheated deli meat, etc. - there are just lots of bacteria that your body can handle easily right now, not so much when baking a baby. But like others have said, pasteurized brie may just save my life. :o)
We are still very young (24 and 25) and I am in no way ready to have a baby yet. I love kids, and I am definitely looking forward to the day we decide to TTC, but I know it is a few years off.
I love our life right now - we are spontaneous on a lot of things, big things like long weekend trips, and small things like going out for drinks spur of the moment. I know that is something we are going to lose when we have a baby.
I love sleeping in, doing absolutely nothing some days, laying in bed all day with DH watching bad TV, etc. I love drinking a whole bottle of wine by myself (very rare, and always regretful, LOL.) and eating nothing but sushi for dinner. I know that right now, I am too lazy and selfish to have a baby.
DH works out of state from March-September, so we need to wait until we are more financially secure so that I can reduce my work hours.
I am getting boudior pictures taken later this year to give to DH on our first anniversary too ;-)
@Lindsay12.31.2010: We're about your age (25 and 25) but I swear, it's like my ovaries have a mind of their own--they keep sending me images of adorable babies that look just like Dh! So hard to resist, lol. We definitely need to work on the sponaneity thing (we, meaning me) since that won't be possible for much longer!
@EleanorRigby: haha. Your FI let's you get thru a whole book. Having my FI is sometimes like having a baby. If I'm doing something for more than 15 minutes with him the room he starts acting up until I pay attention to him. Reading a whole book! Sounds heavenly!!!
I love the term baby bucket list! We cheered in the New Year with the toast "To this time in our lives where we are all baby free!" (we were with 13 of our friends who have yet to have children) I also do not want to start a family until mid 2012, maybe even wait til 2013 (though baby fever is creeping into my brain now too!)
My bucket list includes
- getting into optimum shape. I want stronger arms, and abs and want to feel healthier than I have before.
- Run a sub 1:35 half marathon (goes along with the getting in shape)
-Travel to New Zealand (hopefully this time next year!)
- Pay off the car, some student loans
- get a better handle on our house routines (better organization)
-Fix up my home office
Not the most exciting things but just having the freedom to do them is important, we love being DINKs (Duel Income No Kids!)
I want DH to have a job he likes more than the one he has now. I just don't want him to feel trapped, so I want to wait until he is in a better position. And, I def. want to take him traveling more before we have kids/ if we have them!
@hilsy85: Haha, no I totally understand. DH was dancing with our 2 year old flower girl at the wedding, and it was the sweetest thing I have ever seen. We haven't been married quite as long as you, so I am sure they will get worse soon!
Your wedding pictures were so beautiful, I am sure the two of you will make a beautiful little one! :-)
Our baby bucket list (love the term!) is:
1. Finish FI's degree (business admin)
2. Finish my degree (my last semester of nursing school is this semester!)
3. Finance a house (we've already got several we're looking at, just decision time)
4. Stable jobs for the both of us
5. Travel to Ireland (FI has Irish heritage, we've always wanted to go)
6. Go to Vegas, get drunk and gamble/dance the night away :)
7. Go skydiving and/or cliff-diving
8. Purchase a more child-frindly vehicle (I'm pretty positive that a Jeep Wrangler soft top is not a proper vehicle in which to install a carseat... lol)
Pretty much we just want to see the world a bit more. We're both much too young to be worried about having children yet (me-21, FI-23). We've got a long time to enjoy ourselves ^_^
@artbee: Pasteurized eggs, my friend! I am a total eggs benedict/poached eggs fiend, and though they're not super common, it's totally possible to find pasteurized eggs that you can still eat runny! Some restaurants even use them.
I wish I wouldve done my dream trip to Europe, taken another cruise, just traveling more in general. I know I can still after the baby but it wont be the same.
I am 10 weeks pregnant and we are both so happy but I am kind of wishing that we would have traveled to Europe together before we started trying. I have been lucky enough to have been to Europe twice and have been to over ten countries while there. My husband on the other hand has never been.
While we have done a fair amount of traveling together, Europe is the ultimate in my opinion. We are thinking of going for our 5 year anniversary though and leaving the little one at home with our parents. Is that terrible??!?
For right now it looks like my goals before we start TTC aren't that much:
- Get married & go on honeymoon
- Lose some weight & get in better shape
- Get adjusted to graduate school
- Get a family suitable car
- Have the recommended amount of emergency money
For the longest time I thought I wanted to wait till I was 28 to have kids, so I could do some of the things people have mentioned. Now though I'm not so sure. Vacations are so expensive and since I have to be in school for what seems like forever (currently getting my masters then going for my doctorate), if I had to wait till after I traveled everywhere I want to I would never have kids. Plus I think bringing kids would make it more fun.
Also we had to move in with my elderly father to give him support and since I would never put him in a home we will most likely be with him for a good long time. So that cut out the getting a house first thing (my dad refuses to leave his home).
Now the being done school thing doesn't seem as important either since I realized that I barely work while in school and have a major that is accommodating to mothers. So now its looks like it would be easier to have a baby now in some ways since they would almost be school age by the time I was done with my doctorate.
I guess I'm lucky I'm boring and don't do much, lol.
We had our 1st son when we were 20yrs old and our 2nd when we were 23yrs old. Im now 27yrs old and obviously before I had my 1st I was 19 and I dont drink or go out to clubs. But I did travel with my family, We went to new york, Canada, Guatemala, El Salvador and we had a road trip from Chicago to Central america! That was exhausting to say the least. With our boys we have taken them to El Salvador and DisneyWorld :) We are waiting for our youngest which is 3yrs old to be a bit older to take a family trip to Europe :) The boys really have made us realized how exciting it is to be a parent and you basically get to be a kid again. Yes they do drive me nuts with all the noise and chaos they make but when my house is silent I feel weird. lol
I want to
I'm sure there is more that I could want to do but those are all the main things!
Things I/we can check OFF our Baby Bucket list:
Wished I'd done before getting pregnant (due in 10 weeks! Honeymoon Baby):
Want to do before the Kid arrives:
Huh...looks like I'm pretty satisfied with the stuff I/we've done...thought my want to & wished I'd done stuff would have been longer. Nice!
I <3 cheese and just had to chime in - all LEGAL brie in the USA are pasteurized! All soft-cheeses must be made by pasteurized milk to be sold in the States. It is illegal otherwise.
You may find unpasteurized soft-cheeses in high-end special stores but it'll be very, very expensive and also illegal! Hard cheeses (aged for at least 60 days) can, however be made from unpasteurized milk and it's fine and legal.
Last time I was in France, I resorted to smuggling cheese in!
Edit: I just read that in 2009, 29 states allowed sales of raw-milk but still not for retail and not for human consumption.
http://itsnotyouitsbrie.com/brie-cream-delicious-illegal
http://cheese.about.com/od/cheesebuyingguide/a/raw_cheese.htm
http://homecooking.about.com/od/cookingfaqs/f/faqbriecheese.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_raw_milk_debate
@lola2011
Hehe... to be fair, I do a lot of reading when he is watching football!
I have a friend who wants to TTC right after her wedding, and I told her to go to Applebees on a Saturday night and then get back to me, lol.
Thank you so much for all the suggestions, ladies! It seems like a lot of people want to travel more/wish they'd traveled more pre-baby. As I mentioned, DH and I have wanted to do a Napa Valley-California road trip for a while now, and that's something that we're going to get crossed off the list this summer. We've both been to Europe, so I feel okay about doing that again while pregnant/with a little one, since I"ve experienced it solo already. We're also going on a few more small trips this year, so hopefully we'll be good and traveled out by the time January 2012 rolls around. :)
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