Post # 1
I’m curious how everyone here views the idea of “getting married.” Why is it important to you? What does it mean to you and your SO and your relationship? What do you think will change once you get married? What will stay the same? What type of weight do you put on the idea of “marriage” in your life? Would you stay in your current relationship without it? I’ve heard a lot of friends and family answer this question in a ton of different ways ranging from religious/spirtual reasons, legal reasons, to social reasons. I’m just curious what different ladies from different walks of life have to say about the matter!
Post # 3
To me awedding is a big social party where the coummunity gets together to celebrate the combination of two families and sharing the love of the couple getting married.
MArriage to me is a way to legally legitimisz the social connection between two people who have agreed to life together.
Also, I get a pretty dress and new jewelry.
Post # 4
For me, getting married is just the paper work I have to sign to say he is mine, and I am his legally, so that if one of us is ever sick, or goodness forbid in the hospital after some horrible accident then nothing can keep us apart… I would happily stay with him forever even without marriage, except I am looking for that we both want it to be official.
For him it’s a way of showing that no matter what we are bound together and forever, we love eachother, and won’t ever have to walk completely alone. Which is a really sweet cheesy thing for him to say but still it makes a girls heart flutter (at least mine).
Once we get married the only big change is that we are going to live together, and my last name will change lol
Post # 5
It’s the whole legal and being each other’s forever thing. That’s pretty damn cool if you ask me. 😉
Post # 6
I’ve thought a lot about this recently and for me getting married is the ultimate acceptance [of me] from another person, and the legal/social validation that we have chose each other to go through life. It is very important to me that my husband challenge me and help me grow to be the best person I can be, and to share a family with. I’ve recently realized that if my current relationship does not result in a mutual desire to get married, I can’t stay in it. I cannot help but feel that if the person I love does not want to marry me (whatever reasons) then I will always feel that there is something wrong with me. And I refuse to live my life feeling that way, or feeling like I forced someone to marry me.
Post # 8
Being married means, that no matter what, even if he’s wrong, especially if he’s wrong, my husband has me backing him up, every time. And that if he’s hurt, I’m strong, and if he’s sick, I’m well, when he’s gotten us lost, I’ll find the way and when he’s sad I’ll save the day….likewise on his end…the rest of it is crap and cuisinarts.
Post # 9
being an encore bride-My FI first timer-He has asked me this many times why Is this one special. I was so set against ever getting married again. So when I pray to God I really thought I was looking for a freind with benifts for the rest of my life not a husband or roommate.but the moment I met my FI I knew God wanted us to be together and he was choosen for me and I for him. So we both want to be right in Gods eys. And I have never lived with a man without being married and can not imagine life without him.
Post # 10
To me, I view the idea of “getting married” as making a formal committment to one another that you are going to be with them through this journey called life–through the good parts, through the crap parts, through everything. You are officially signifying that you are a team, that there’s no escape route, that you can’t just “break up”, that this is final (obviously, this isn’t always true because there is divorce, but I hope divorce will never be on the table with us!). Much of this is shaped by my religious views–I am a devout Christian and I believe marriage is a gift from God modeled after God’s own relationship with the Church and with everyone He created (though I obviously don’t want to force this belief down anyone’s throat: my faith is my own and it’s personal to me, and I don’t judge others for believing differently!). I don’t believe marriage is neccessary for everyone to have a long, happy, committed relationship, but it IS neccessary for me, and I’ve always known I wanted to get married when I found the one–I was just so lucky to find that one when I was 19 (I’m 21 now).
As to what will change when I get married: I’m sure lots of things will change. We’ll be living together for the first time, we’ll be growing up together and both changing and growing a lot. What will stay the same is that we will be committed to each other and that we will work to show that love and committment every day.
Post # 11
Its important for legal and social reasons… though religion used to be on the table as well. We feel it when we have to deal with paying bills, taxes, insurance, next of kin/proxy etc… blah. Parents and coworkers are the biggest social drivers, but also random people who feel the need to comment.
Besides the end of our recurring bickering about when we’re getting hitched, I think everything else will stay the same because we live together. Marriage is a BFD to me, but I’d stay in this relationship without it until I’m in my late 20s, because that’s about the time I’d need to seriously think about babies and even though he’s wonderful, I want a family. Thankfully, for now he’s on the same page, so I’m happy to wait.
Post # 12
Marriage, like others had mentioned, is just the official stuff I have to do to get his name, make him mine for ever 🙂
Post # 13
Being married means it’s official that he has to put up with me farting and I have to put up with his failure to put his dirty clothes in the hamper.
Among other things 🙂
Post # 14
@AGTbee: i often wonder why people get married. as for me, I’m a kinda a cynic but i like the take the last name thing, being with him thru thick & thin. Knowing you’ve got a companion for life.
Post # 15
Post # 16
It means I have made the harder of the two choices. The easier choice is always to walk away when things inevitably get hard, but I won’t. And he won’t. And through all those times that you just desperately wish you could start over, you don’t start over, and all of those hard days and those easy days are bricks that keep stacking up until you’ve built yourselves a life together. If I get even one moment of the pure happiness DH has given me during our marriage, it’s well worth all of the other fights, disagreements, boredom, restlessness and annoyance that comes with living with someone and sharing a life together.