Post # 1
My mom just asked me what my FI will call my mother after we are married. I responded with her first name. She gasped and said that he should call her mom.
I explained that I will be calling his mother by her first name and certainly won’t be calling her mom.
My mom defended herself saying that my FI and I are really close with my mom.
I still don’t think that justifies it.
She said, after we have kids, he can refer to her as grandma or whatever nickname we come up with.
What does your husband call your mother?
What do you call his mother?
Post # 3
We use first names. My mom does call my dad’s parents mom and dad but I think that came after years of marriage. I can’t say we won’t get to that point, but at first it’s just first names.
Post # 4
I call my MIL by her first name, and he calls his MIL by her first name. He only has one mother in this world, and he reserves that name for her only.
Post # 5
My mother adores it. She was really touched when he started calling her “Mom” the last time we visited. It’s harder for me since we see his parents less, but they’re “Mom” and “Dad” too.
Post # 6
My husband calls my mum by her first name and I call his by her first name. Only time we call them anything else is when talking to our daughter, then we call them grandma.
Post # 7
I call FI’s mom “Mom” when I speak directly to her. If I reference her to someone else (his dad, my mom, etc.) I call her by first name to distinguish her from my mom. I call his dad “Pops” because that’s what he calls his dad.
FI calls my mom and dad by first names, but I think that’s a guy thing.
Post # 8
I think DH avoids calling them by name, LoL! But if asked he would call them by their first names. I call his parents by their names. I’ve noticed that my brother and his wife now call all parents by their grandparent names since their baby came along!
We both have living parents so we wouldn’t ever call the others by Mom or Dad.
Post # 9
Oh hell no, DH will not be calling my mother “mom.” He will call her by her first name, and same with me.
Sorry, it’s my total pet peeve when I hear people calling their in-laws “mom” and “dad.” It’s just weird! IDK why I think that, but I always have.
No offense to bees who do this! To each their own…
Post # 10
@ajillity81: FI calls my parents by their first names. They are his in laws, not his actual parents, so calling them mom and dad would make no sense to me. However, we have a furbaby who my parents call their “grandpup.” As such, FI will sometimes call her grandma, especially when furbaby is around so he knows who we are talking about (he knows what “go see grandma” means, lol).
Post # 11
@QueenOfSerendip: +1. I find it weird too. If my mom is also FI’s mom, that would make him my brother. That would also make him NOT my FI. Ew.
Post # 12
He’s called her everything from Mrs. Lastname, Ms. Firstname, Firstname, and Mom… in the same week, even. He met her long before she was his FMIL, and called her Mrs. Lastname and Ms. Firstname back then.
She signs all the cards and gifts she gives him as Mom.
Post # 13
My DH calls my parents by their first names. My mother calls her in-laws “mom and dad”. I ‘m pretty sure it’s a generational thing.
Post # 14
@ajillity81: my FI calls my mom “Ma” and my dad “Pa” or “Pops”. He’s the only one who calls them that, and I don’t know why he does, but it works! My step-parents are called by their first names. I call his parents by their first names.
Post # 15
It really depends on the situation. Both sets of parents told us at the beginning that we were welcome to call them Mom and Dad, but they didn’t want to make it awkward for anyone. DH called his FIL Dad at the wedding and my dad thought it was great. When we’re around just one set of parents, we can usually say Mom and Dad, no matter which set of parents they are. But when both of them are together, neither of us can do it.
Post # 16
He calls his MIL by her first name (and I call my MIL by her first name as well). We are both really close with and get along great with our in-laws but no one will ever be “mom” to me except for the woman who gave birth to and raised me!