(Closed) What happens at the ceremony?

posted 7 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I think it’s pretty much whatever you want to happen.  My FI and I aren’t religious, so we’re just going to process down the aisle with our bridal party, have the officiant say a few words, read our vows, kiss, and process back.  We’re expecting it to take about fifteen minutes.  :p

On the other hand, his family is mostly Catholic and we just went to his cousin’s wedding which lasted a full hour because they had a mass which involved the procession, a homily, readings from the Bible, hymns, the exchanging of the vows, prayers, communion, and then processing back up the aisle.

It really all depends on what you want.  I’ve seen some weddings where the bridal party didn’t even process down the aisle at all but instead had everyone standing up front at the beginning.  Maybe ask some friends and family that are married what they did for their ceremony to get some ideas about what you want.  The officiant might have some ideas too, but I think the ceremony will be more personal and special to you if you inject some of your own ideas into it.  Either way, I’m sure your ceremony will be great!

Post # 4
Member
931 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Here’s ours:

Process

Greeting and foundation (or sermon if you’re in a church)

Song

Vows

Unity Ceremony

Rings

Kiss/Presentation

Recessional

Post # 5
Member
11327 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

You can design it however you want! Ours basically went like this: 

Welcome

statement of intent

reading #1

love letter ceremony

homily (sermon– totally can skip this if you aren’t religious)

song

reading #2

vows

exchange of rings

blessing of rings

prayer

closing words

announcement/kiss

Post # 7
Member
11327 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@TinyTina: no, vows are the “i promise to this that and the other” and the exchange of rings are the “i give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you etc”

Post # 9
Member
11327 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I’m copy/pasting our declaration of intention, vows, and exchange of rings so you can see the difference. It was something I was confused about as well before I started working on the ceremony. 

Declaration of intention (minister read the whole thing and you just answer I Do): 

Do you, _____, offer yourself wholly and joyfully, and do you choose ______  as the person with whom you will share your life, in laughter and in tears, in conflict and tranquility, loving what you know of her, and trusting what you do not know yet, for as long as you both shall live? (I do)

Vows (these the minister reads and you repeat): 

I, ____, take you ____ to be my wife and my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. I promise to love you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. To live with you and laugh with you. To stand by your side and to sleep in your arms. To be the most that I can be for you, when our love is simple, and when it is an effort. I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the woman you will become, and falling in love a little more every day. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward for as long as we both shall live.

Exchange of rings (minister reads and you repeat):

“I give you this ring as a sign that I choose you.
 I promise from this day forward you shall not walk alone.  May my heart be your shelter and my arms be your home. Wear it, think of me, and know that I love you.”

Post # 10
Member
931 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I recommend printing out a bunch of the Bee ceremony recaps. That’s what we did. We ended up using a lot of their words/ceremony parts to write our own ceremony.

I recommend starting with “Nearly Nautical” and “The Luckiest” (I think you should find those if you search.

Post # 11
Member
3526 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Also if you google officiants some of them have sample ceremonies on their websites. That’s where I started.

Post # 13
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Ours was very short and simple:

 We both walk down the aisle

Officiant reads some things

One reading from a friend

Vows/ring exchange

Second friend reads a different thing

Officiant finishes up

We kiss, we leave

We didn’t do a unity candle or anything like that. We also only had music for the procession in, and just one song (there were not a lot of people processing in and the procession took less than one full song!). The whole thing took maybe 20 minutes or less.

Our officiant had some sample scripts that we could cut and paste from to make our desired script/vows. That helped a lot. The readings we picked on our own without help from our officiant, although she had suggestions for that too that we could have used.

Post # 14
Member
2829 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

our ceremony break down goes like this:

(after the people sit & we gather)

  • welcome
  • solemnizer/statement of intent
  • vows
  • explantation of handfasting followed by the “hands” reading (during which we will do the bindings–not spoken/read ‘promises’ but the literal knots)
  • solemnizer/declaration
  • exchange of rings
  • married! kisses and joyous merriment

then we will ‘recess’ and proceed with the merry making.

I definitely found a lot of inspiration from the bees’ recaps as well as the ceremony section in general. Our officiant gave us like 3 example ceremonies to play with & after brainstorming a lot we wrote the entire ceremony ourselves.

Post # 15
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I can send you my entire ceremony written out if you want! Its on my computer right now and that way you can see each part and what is included. PM me if you are interested!

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