Post # 1
My mind is still racing so I apologize if this jumps around. I just got engaged yesterday. We are both thrilled.
He had planned on asking my parents for their blessing first. The initial plan was to ask them at a superbowl party, then propose on Valentines day. However, my mom didn’t go to the party and my dad was busy socializing so my boyfriend didn’t ask; it just wasn’t the right time. Unfortunately, we wouldn’t be able to see them again until after Valentines day.
He had already bought the ring and was so excited that he couldn’t wait until the 14th. So, when we were having a quiet afternoon in together, he asked. I immediately said of course! We’re keeping the news quiet now because he still wants to ask my parents.
I’m worried that my parents may not give their blessing. They love him and think he’s great, they just think we haven’t been together long enough. They are also slightly worried because my boyfriend (I mean fiance) has been both married and engaged in the past. The marriage was because his girlfriend got pregnant; they were very young and the marriage didn’t last a year. She left him. That was ten years ago. His fiance also left him; that was almost a year before we met. We’ve been together over 8 months but are incredibly happy and in love. I know in my heart that this is right.
So, how do we handle my parents? What if they say no? Should I email my mom first telling her that he’s intending on asking her and that I truly feel like this is right for me? Do I trust that they’ll say okay? I don’t want a conflict with them over this to ruin how excited and happy I feel right now.
Post # 3
don’t worry about all the what-ifs. wait and see what happens.
Post # 4
@munchkin656: i was engaged twice before….the last one, i had been the guy for 4 yrs, we had wedding plans underway, nothing bought though, and in the end, i left him….bout 2-3 months after the break-up, i started dating FH….and then 8 months into our relationship, he proposed….. 🙂
i can’t tell ya how your parents will react, but i just wanted to let ya kno my ‘background’ per se, just so you can have a bit of hope…..my parents were against our relationship at first….they liked FH but thought it was too soon, that i didn’t even give myself time to heal and blah blah blah…..truth is, my feelings for my ex had long been gone and it just took me awhile to realize it….and I knew 100% in my heart that FH was the one…..sure it sucked that my parents weren’t so sure and all that but now? they seem to have warmed up and i’m pretty sure its cuz they’ve noticed how in love we are and how happy i am compared to how i was in my previous relationships….
so hang in there…and congrats on your engagement!!! 🙂
Post # 5
I feel like you’re asking for a blessing, not permission. If they say no, you have to decide what’s more important to you, their blessing or getting married.
Post # 6
First off – It seems a little silly to me to ask for their blessing after he’s already proposed to you. The deed is done – so to speak. Are you then going to lie to them about your engagement story so they think it took place after he asked for their blessing? I’d just tell them you’re engaged and let them be happy for you.
That said – if you do still “ask for their blessing” and they don’t give it – what are you going to do? Are you not going to marry your FI just because your parents don’t approve? Yeah – it might suck. But will it really change anything?
Congrats on your engagement!