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what if EVERYONE comes?!

posted 3 years ago in Paper
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    1.
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    Blushing bee
    BenJerrysBride    August 2009   Stowe, Vermont

    We sent out our invitations last week and have been getting feedback that everyone loved them - I keep trying to focus on that but all I can think is "what if everyone we invited comes?!" We have a pretty strong cap on how many can fit in our reception space and we did the math like 15 times estimating 10-15% declines and factoring in that little kids don't really count as seats etc, but I seriously have not been able to enjoy the fact that the invitations are done because I'm worried everyone will just decide that this is the wedding they're coming to this summer. And I certainly don't want to think conceitedly about it but that circumstances and enough advance notice encouraged people to make it a priority or easy to come!  AHHHH what will we do space and money wise if we exceed our cap!?

    Now of course i know that the declines are least likely to come in first but right now we're looking at 31 to 5 and I'm worried. Any words of advice, consolation, abilities to magically make a room a little bigger?

    p.s. I'm sure i'll be replying soon that I was over reacting, but until then...

     
    2.
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    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    Breathe! Not everyhone will come, I promise. Even people who live locally gave us NO rsvp's b/c their daughters' friend is getting married that weekend or simply it's a bad weekend or maybe they just don't flippin' wanna come! Wait until the problem arises to deal with it. Otherwise you'll go "man i stressed over nothing" like I do every single time =]

     
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    Bumble bee
    ilovenycmissie    September 2009   nyc

    Yeah, that's my worry too, I sent out 63, the absolute cap is 70, I'm not inviting more than capacity; dont want to go beyond cap in case people show up

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    1. what if EVERYONE comes?! :  wedding space worried Img tag1.JPG (222.3 KB, 36 downloads) 1 year old
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    Helper bee
    FutureMrsBLT    September 12, 2009   Washington, DC

    I worry about that too, but my mom gave me the best advice she said, when you do your budget plan like everyone you invite is going to come and each person that declines is extra money in your pocket.  I'm sure that not everyone will come, but I would definitely plan for "the worst" so that it doesn't catch you off guard.  Good luck!

     
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    Bumble
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    bellenga    July 31, 2010   Georgia

    I hate to say this, but how about making a few dozen phone calls to the ones who haven't rsvp'd?  Or have your mom or friends do some recon?

     
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    Bumble bee
    ilovenycmissie    September 2009   nyc

    my wedding is 3 months away, if I haven't gotten the rsvps I am going to call each person, thats the nice thing of having a small guest list, not too many people to call, and half of it is my imediate family who are coming for sure; 5 already rsvpd

    so 33 more to go woohoo!

     
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    Busy bee
    aloweha      

    I'm freaking about this too. I couldn't sleep last night because my stomach was in knots over my guest list. I'm worried about those we didn't invite being upset and those we had to invite (random family etc.) that we don't really want there, coming. Sigh, it's going to be a long, sleepless 5 months.

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    Worker bee
    snoopnaz23    June 20, 2009   Bethesda, MD

    I was (am) in the same boat as you!  Up until yesterday I was FREAKING out because we had about 150 accepts and 10 regrets.  Now, we are still missing a good number of RSVPs (we invited 280) and our deadline is on Wed (but thats another issue entirely), but FINALLY yesterday we recieved 22 regrets!!!  I was so happy I did a little dance!  Like aloweha, we had to invite a lot of family that I do not really know/don't really want to come.  (In my opinion these people probably feel the same way and don't even want to come, at least thats what I'm hoping!)  But we've started getting the regrets now that the deadline is drawing close.  Plus we got a couple regrets from people who were planning on coming but something came up.  Don't worry, its VERY unlikely that everyone will be able to come.  Let's just all keep our fingers crossed that it works out for us all!!!

     
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    Blushing bee
    JDH    June 6, 2009  

    I PROMISE not everyone will come.  I had the same freak out because our guest list ballooned to over 400.  I was hoping for 300.  We sent the save the dates too.  Our deadline was last Friday and we still have about a total of 60 people that we still have to find out whether they are coming but we are at 256 right now and if everyone comes who hasn't responded we would be at 322 which is close enough.  Even with our save the dates we will land right in the 25% no rate.  So take a deep breath and know that there will be "No"s :)  Good luck!

     
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    Bumble bee
    ilovenycmissie    September 2009   nyc

    I'm the same, I'm on a budget and had wanted only 50 people with a budget of 15,000; now it's abllooned ot $22,000 including honeymoon and now the guest list if every single person comes is 68, ARRRGGGHHHHHHH; the cap is 70 at the venue, and for me to pull this off and feel comfortable and have enough to buy a house, the guest list should been only 50

     

    here's hoping my OOT don't come; one no rsvp; so far 32 confirmed guests; sounds awful, but I hope not everyone can make it; the show rate is high because its immediate family first cousins and best friends and local friends; it's just all these ittle add-ons that's ruining my zen

     

    I need zen..... 

     
    11.
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    Worker bee
    snoopnaz23    June 20, 2009   Bethesda, MD

    Well hopefully what happened to me will happen to you all!  4 out of my 50 extra OOT/courtesy invites are coming!!!  SUCH a relief!!!  Now I don't know that it will work out the same for you, but I do know that I wish I would have saved all the stressing and panicking for when I knew for a fact how many people were coming!  Now I realize that all that freaking out was for nothing.  So just try to put it out of your mind until you know for sure.  If they all end up coming, you'll work it out somehow...but more than likely they won't and you'll have worried for nothing!  GOOD LUCK!!!!!

     
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    Blushing bee
    alshv2    6/6/2009   St. Louis

    Same here... I spent WAY too many hours worrying about what we would do if too many people surprised us and RSVPed "yes". But now that we are finally getting a good idea of the total count, it is looking like we should come in a few people under the venue's max (RELIEF!). Looking back, I really should have stopped worrying about it and just waited for the RSVPs to come in. That would have saved me so much grief. I knew that some people would decline, but it is so hard to convince yourself of that when you are thinking about the worst-case scenario! Don't worry, they won't all come. In our case, people are on vacation, going to other weddings or graduation parties, unable to afford the travel costs, have to work, etc.

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    Busy bee
    msduck    August 2009  

    so far i have about 75% of the RSVPs in (due date was the 8th) and 10% of the RSVP was decline.............

     

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