- 4 years ago
- Wedding: April 2013
My Friend is getting married she told me she was planning on May because that is thier dating anniversary. Well I got her Save the Dates and apparently at some point they decided to change it to February.
After my wedding I moved, and now I am basically freelancing for my previous employer. Clearly I am no longer working fulltime for now. I previously volunteered in Thailand for an organization that helps victims of sex trade. Long story short I’m going to Thailand Jan 7 to February 28, then my husband is flying out to meet me there for a few days after which we will be going to the Philippines.
I booked my tickets a couple of days before I got her save the dates. At that point I considered calling and seeing if I could switch around dates with the nonprofit. Before I could do that my husband was like you just bought tickets, we booked our resort, and I already let my partner know I would be gone so we can start to juggle things for when I’m gone. Of course I was like we are months out why can’t you just move things around. But he was adamant about not switching the dates for various reasons . I considered going after her wedding but if I go after her wedding I’m going to be there only 9 days and there is no way I can complete the things I promised in nine days.
So I called her and told her the deal. She was disappointed but didn’t really respond. My husband is going to New York for work, I decided to tag a long then go home to visit my parents. I texted her and said Hey let us take you and your Fi out somewhere super nice and fancy. You can pick if you want. No response. I called her left a message, no response. Finally she wrote me a message: Sorry I’m super busy just like you and D(mutual friend who has baby due in December who is unsure if she coming to wedding as well).
I called her apologized again and asked her if she was ok and to give some moral support. Well she went on a tirade the gist of the conversation, “I’m majorly fucked up” and if it was her she wouldn’t think of flying off to go on “vacation” over a friend’s wedding. She spent so much money going to my wedding and supporting me and now she is getting married everyone is apparently too busy or have more important things to do. As far as I know out of our college friends it’s just D and I who probably aren’t going.
Not to mention the fact that for months and even the beginning of September she has been telling me a specific date. She ends the conversation by saying “well it must be nice to have all this free flexible time to constantly be flying all over the place. But I guess if I was sitting on my ass doing nothing with a husband to pay my bills I would do the same. “ Even if this was completely true which it isn’t, what gives you right to comment on my personal business?
Really, that is how you talk to a friend of ten years, who has never ever exchanged even a cross word with you? Even when I was stressed planning my wedding I can’t imagine talking to someone like that. At that point I was like “You clearly are stress out so I’m going to get off the phone now.” Even after planning a wedding I don’t get what happens to people and what comes over them to make them behave like that? People literally lose their minds! She is a really really kind person, and normally is always nice and sweet.