Post # 1
As my wedding draws closer, I’m finding it harder and harder to foot so many costs happening. So, far this is what I’ve already paid for:-
Hair and makeup
Gift – around $50 value
There’s still things that need to be done leading up to the big day but I’m not sure if I need to step up to these “duties”, including:-
One week before the wedding, to meet up to discuss scheduling. Take them out to lunch?
Manis and pedis?
Any alternatives to the above?
As much as I love my girls, I’m starting to sweat at all the costs involved! Is there an average of what’s required?
Post # 3
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
Are you in America? In America, the BMs buy their own dresses and are responsible for their own lodging. Brides only pay for things like hair, makeup, manis and pedis, etc if they require them.
Post # 4
I am paying for their hair and makeup and a gift for them (a little over $50 each).
They are paying for their dresses, but I kept it in a price range they agreed upon and am actually doing a trade with the seamstress to bring the price down further. They are paying for their hotel rooms, although they are welcome to stay with me the night before the wedding so they don’t have a cost. They would have gotten a hotel room to attend the wedding anyway, so that’s sort of a wash.
They can wear whatever shoes and jewelry they want.
I think the costs are reasonable on both sides.
Post # 5
I am not paying for anything but their gifts!
Holy moly your spending more on them then I am on my whole wedding lol just about though!
I would put an end to it. You dont need to go to lunch to meet up, just have them to your house
Post # 6
@kjo: Would love them to just drop by my place, but I live an hour away from the closest BM! Yeh , its been pretty crazy.
Post # 7
@mrsSonthebeach: For my Asian background, the BM pays absolutely zilch.
However they will be paying for their own accessories and shoes.
Yeh think I’ll just email them the schedule and tell individuals of their specific duties, it’s getting too costly for me!
Considering I had been BM twice before and had manis and pedis done for both, I had assumed I am also to foot those. Guess I can just sneek under the radar on that one!
Post # 8
I am only paying for gifts… The dresses are about 160, and the shoes are up to them, they just have to be silver and sparkly
Post # 9
I don’t understand why you need a meeting to discuss scheduling. All they’ve really got to do is be at your house/room at a certain time, and then walk where they’re told! Skip the meeting, and no need to buy them lunch, or manis and pedis. Especially since they’re all an hour or more away, the meeting could just be an inconvenience. I would just phone each of them.
Post # 10
@paula1248: Coz we won’t be having a rehearsal, I haven’t seen some of them in weeks. Guess it’s more a “nice to have” but you’re right, considering how hectic it’ll be up til the day, I think I’ll give it a miss.
Post # 11
@blinx: I don’t understand. If you are from a background where they don’t pay anything then you can’t really ask what’s the “norm.” For most of us we don’t pay for most of our BM’s expenses. Maybe I missed something?
Post # 12
I wouldnt pay for a lunch or for manis/pedis. Wouldn’t they need to get them done anyway(don’t they keep them up anyway?)? I think that will save u a minimum of $500.
Post # 13
@gelaine22: I’m not getting it either. I think I’ll end up spending about $40 per BM on gifts. A wrap for their dresses I decided after the fact they needed (so I bought), accessories and since we all have to get up early for wedding day prep… Starbucks.
Post # 14
@dmk90716: ooh, I like the Stalacks idea. My venue has a huge bridal suite so they are making us whatever we want as brunch. I was thinking of doing mimosa bar. I saw it on Pinterest and I’ve been obsessed ever since.
Post # 15
I’m paying for the dresses, hair, makeup, and a small gift. I’m only having 3 bridesmaids though so it’s not THAT bad.
Post # 16
I’m paying for their hair $65 per girl, and $100 on each of their gifts.