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For me it's a toss up between two different things but here is one, at least the one I consider the funniest.
My fiance had recently moved back home to help them financially. Well no one was in the house when we got there so we went to his room and enjoyed ourselves if you get my drift. We were... uh... enjoying ourselves when his grandma came home unknown to us. I was REALLY enjoying myself and got a little loud. Right after my moment of screaming out in pleasure we hear the answering machine start playing back messages. Which is placed close enough to his room that their is no way on this planet she didn't hear. I thought I was going to die of embarrassment. I didn't leave that room for hours. I swore I'd go out the window before I faced her again, but FI finally dragged me out (he doesn't have a shy bone in his body).
This would undoubtly be my fiance's most embarrassing moment. My mom, my fiance, and I were talking about our future children's names one night. So we're throwing out names at each other. I throw out my mom's first name, but she goes by her middle so fiance didn't know or had forgotten one. So I say "What do you think about Deborah?" He wrinkles up his nose and sticks out his tongue. He says "No way". I bust up laughing as my mom is sitting across from us with the most shocked look on her face. He goes "What?!?!? What?!?!?!" Then it hits him as his lookig back from my amusment and my mothers mixture of amusment and shock "it's your mom's name isn't it?" "YEP!" I chime in happily. His face actually turned a little pink, which has happened maybe 10 times in the almost 4yrs we've been together.
I went to the bathroom (#1) and i took a shower.. i noticed the toilet was overflowing a min or so after . So i stepped out to try to call for my FI and i fell... It went into the hallway and onto some of the carpet.. luckily only my FI room... However... pee/water was all over... Everyone was trying to get it to stop and it was all over and people were slipping. My FI always plugs the toliet up however he blamed it on me ...grr omg
i haven't embarrassed myself YET, but one of my dogs did a fine job of it for me! it was christmas day and i brought my dogs over to FMIL's house. we were there for a whole 5 minutes and one of my girls walked right into the center of the living room and took a dump. i could have DIED!! my dogs are so housebroken that i can be at work for 10-12 hours and they still don't potty in the house, so i was totally not expecting that. FMIL was totally cool about it, though. i'm extremely fortunate in the MIL department ;-)
I was sitting in my car waiting for my Fiance to walk out of his parents house ( I was picking him up.) Well, I HAD to pass gas.... The next thing you know...... he comes out with BOTH HIS PARENTS!!! They wanted to show me something they had just purchased!! (OH NO!!) Well, I rolled my window down and my future father in law stuck his head in my window to tell me Hi and he stuck it right back out!! Quick too!! He is a really funny guy and he laughed and went,"OH MY GOSH!!! Poor son, she can beat you any day with those!!!"
I was so so so so so embarrased. It really was like the worse smell ever....
These are hilarious!!! I haven't done anything yet *knock on wood*!!!!
Boyfriend's dad is kinda open about everything.... Ya know, walks around the house in his underwear, etc.... Over the summer we were at his parent's house for dinner. I went upstairs to use the bathroom and his dad was already in there.... except he didn't CLOSE THE DOOR!! That's right ladies.... I saw my FFIL sitting on the toilet doin' his business. I was MORTIFIED! His dad thought it was hilarious, but my face was red for about a week!
Right after FI and I first started dating, I was driving with him from our school (high school, lol) back to my house to hang out, and my car ran out of gas! I freaked out and tried to pull into the bank, but it has an inclined entry, and I got stuck halfway up! My parents weren't home, so he had to call his dad to come over there and bring me some gas - it was the first time I ever met my FFIL! I was mortified, and I felt SO bad that he had to do that for me and he didn't even know me!
Hahaha, these are funny! I think the only really embarassing thing I've done in front of his mother is when I was sooooo drunk. She lives out of town and we were going to visit her Friday after we got out of work. My co-workers and I got out early so we went to the bar as I waited for him to get out of work too. There were a lot of mixed drinks being had by all. By the time he picked me up, I was soooo sick. I threw up on the floor of our car. 2 hours later we arrive at his mother's house and all I could do was stumble to the guest bedroom and take a looooong nap. Ooops! Luckily, she's done similar stuff in front of me since then!
Here's mine:
We were over his parents for dinner one night and afterwards we all were hanging around watching TV. I had to use the restroom so I get up, walk into the bathroom and sit down on the toilet. I start peeing and then look over at the sink which has a big, fat, honking spider sitting in it. Not your average spider, this spider is called a huntsman spider and while harmless, they are the size of your hand. I think I tried to scream but I was so scared no sound came out. Of course, I am mid-stream I can't get up and run out. Finally, I run out of the bathroom panicked, probably with some pee on me because I jumped up before done and they are all looking at me like "what the hell happened to you?" After some laughing and ribbing about me being a chicken foreigner, my husband and FIL took pity on me and got rid of it. Because I was NOT staying in the house with that sucker.
Throw up. Bad, bad migraine. Luckily I made it to the sink, then the toilet. Fi cleaned up the sink before his mom arrived at the scene- thankfully!
His mom was so sweet but I was mortified.
whoa that thing is scary....I probably would have died right there on the potty
@aloweha - That thing is disgusting, I'd probably have fainted. After doing the no sound scream thing. Shudder
I was having dinner with my in laws in Okinawa Japan. We all were drinking that week and I got my usual drink. WELL their alcohol ratio was wayyy more then I was used too. Im a big lightweight. after half of a cup of my drink I was totally drunk. When Im drunk I cant speak Japanese, my mind shuts down. so they keep talking to me and i just repeating in Japanese. Im sorry I have no idea what your saying...im soooooooo tiredddddddd.......sleeeeeeeeeepppy!! hahahaha my MIL had to take me home early so I could just go to BED
It was terrifying to be stuck in there with it and then mortifying to realize I ran into the livingroom with pee on myself! It was prob 2 years ago and still to this day I will not use that bathroom in my in-laws house in case any of his buddies are hanging around.
OMG...the farting thing is HILARIOUS.
Last summer FI & I went to FIL's house to stay the weekend. I had heard my friends (male) use an expression before that I thought meant something was just SO funny. Well FFIL told a joke and in front of him and FI I said "Oh my gosh that was so funny I busted a nut" FI and FFIL look at me and I just like an idiot smile and walk away. FI comes up and says "do you know what that means" I said yeah it means something is super funny, he says "no honey, it is what a guy says about cumming" OH.MY.GOSH. I died, I mean I totally said that in front of FFIL. I have since NEVER said that again for obvious reasons. FI had to tell FFIL that I had no idea what it was so he didn't think I was a total pervert.
HAHAHA..Busting a nut! That is the funniest thing I have read. I literally laughed out loud. I didn't know what it meant either.
This such a great post.
@Mrskesslertobe- It was SO not funny at the time but I have since looked at it and just laughed my butt off. I know pay attention to everything I say so FIL's don't think their son is marrying some pervert.
I am also now enlightened as to the real meaning of bust a nut.
Krissy -- I also walked in on FFIL, but thankfully, I didn't have my contacts in and it was dark = nearly blind, so we both knew I didn't realllly see anything. But we laughed it off anyway.
Sadly, that isn't even the most embarassing. Mostly, they are pretty easy going people. We were talking about making the Dean's List at college. I have never NOT been on the Dean's List, and even in high and elementary school, I think there was only one marking period in my life that I didn't make honors. I forget that it's not an all or nothing situation where you either make it all the time or don't make it at all. So my perspective on this is perhaps skewed. I tell you this just so you know my background and what influenced my thinking, not to brag. Anyway, in this conversation, I commented about someone telling me that his mom saved all his and his siblings' Dean's List awards and framed them, and I thought that was odd because, I mean, there would just be so many of them, you know? If it happens all the time, to me it isn't worth framing, it's just a part of life. Yeah... guess who it was that told me this and I'd forgotten -- FI! Yup, they're in the living room behind the couch, which I just am so used to seeing I forget what's actually there. (They save every trophy, medal, award, etc.) His mom was like "Oh, I do that, too. I think it's nice." I was so embarassed. Thankfully, she wasn't too upset about it.
My little situation happened when we first started dating - like within the first month!! I had to use the bathroom in a hurry and he told me to use the one on the 1st floor. The door was closed and it didn't look like any lights were on inside so instead of knocking to make sure, I opened the door to find his dad making #2 while reading a newspaper! He screamed - probably more in horror of being walked in on - and shut the door. I was utterly mortified!! I cried the rest of the night and of course my fiance was laughing at me - I had to face his dad and my FMIL a few days later for Thanksgiving. I was so embarassed!!!
I'm so glad he's got such a cool, easy-going family - we still laugh about it almost 5 years later!!
My husband has this really annoying sniffle that he does for no reason. Doesn't have a cold or a runny nose, just sniffs really loud. Yeah, I dunno. He knows it bothers me and I was always very open about telling him to keep it down because it was REALLY loud.
So, when we first moved in together, my MIL came for a visit. I actually came down with a really, really bad sinus infection the day she arrived and spent most of the time laying down on the couch and reading/watching TV. MIL and I were on okay terms at that point, but one afternoon, I was REALLY looking forward to them leaving for a while so I could lay down and sleep in the peace and quiet. They decided to just hang out at the apartment and read (Yeah, I dunno about that, either). While watching TV, I was trying to doze off, and right when I was about to, I heard a loud sniffle from who I thought was the hubs. I let it go, but it kept happening, and finally, I just shortly said without getting up, "hey, hubs, can you stop doing that!?" Later that night in bed, he told me it wasn't him, it was MIL. I was mortified and felt HORRIBLE, and the next morning I made a comment like, "Gosh, cold medicine really makes me unusually cranky, I'm sorry if I seemed that way yesterday."
haha, i love this thread!!
Mine happened the day we were bridal dress shopping - Fiance's mom was in front seat, my mom in back. I was stopped at a light and I felt a HUGE sneeze coming on. Well, I sneezed, but guess what popped out with it? A nice perky fart! I was SO embarassed - there was silence for about a second and then EVERYONE burst into laughter. At the very least it was a really innocent way to fart in front of her for the first time!!
Ugh, I have tummy issues. I was at my future sister-in-laws bridal shower. My FI and I had just gotten engaged and this was the first time I was meeting some of the extended family and ALL the family friends. Guess who got an embarassing attack of the big "D" at the 1 bathroom restaurant? I had to send my father-in-law out to find me imodium, so embarassing and since I was at a party filled with Jewish mommies everyone started pulling out other stomach and anti-diarrhea pills and telling me all the stories of this happening to them drawing even more attention to it even though I was trying to be discrete. Now every time I see any of their family friends they ask how my stomach is doing, I will never live it down.
HAHA! These are awesome stories!!
@ aloweha I'm not a squeamish but that spider's no joke!
We were at FI's cousin's house at a combo graduation/going away party for a few different people - practically his entire family was there. They'd hired a band to play in the backyard and there's these walkways in between their veggie garden & people were using the gravel walkways as a dance floor. Late night everyone was dancing & singing & having a great time. I was wearing flip flops & a sundress, I tripped on a rock in the garden & slid down the slope of the gravel path toward where the band was - the skirt of my dress slid up around my waist, I tried to turn around and stop myself and I landed in a full face-plant in front of my FFIL. I took out a tiki torch out on my way down too. As if that wasn't bad enough, the strap on my flip flop broke so I was walking around the rest of the night barefoot with cut up thighs & the palms of my hands were bleeding from the gravel but I didn't care cuz I was mortified. I'd embarrassed myself & basically shown my entire future family my undies. Thing is, I wasn't even drinking because I had to drive home.
They all tried to make me feel better but I still feel stupid just thinking about it. My ears are actually red just writing this post.
@justinandstephanie: That's just like that commercial where the guy puts his GF in the car and she lets a BIG one rip, and it turns out his parents are in the back seat! LMAO!!
My most embarassing moment was after a long drive to go visit the ILs, I told them I was tired and I was going to sleep in the RV (which was true!). But DH comes in and wants to hanky panky...so of course we did. It's a nice way to go to sleep! But his brother came knocking on the RV door right in the middle of it and was all grossed out and went inside and told everyone what we were doing. He's a 34 year old man, sex shouldn't gross him out enough to want to embarass me like that!
@aloweha- no joke, I would have had a stroke. If I was lucky I would have ran out immediately with my pants at my ankles. But most likely I would of died! That is horrifying and I'm still freaking out just from the picture.
@dancy- that sounds more like a sitcom!
@ justinandstephanie- LOL! That's just great. Reminds me of when I farted in front of FI's brother. I thought I was going to die because I had my butt up in the air (i know weird to hear w/o the whole story).
@ aloweha- I would have done the same thing. I HATE spiders. When i saw a picture of it I litterally got chills going down my back. That thing is HUGE!
@ SoontoobeMrsM- I laughed so hard I snorted!
Wow I never realized how many people don't lock bathroom doors! I would be mortified if that happened to me.
@sweetheartDealer- i think we've all done that at one time or another. Just wait till she does it. :) I laughed so hard when I read that!
@DVsMom- how humiliating! I'd have wanted to pass out with embarrassment
@Dancy905- I think we might be long lost sisters!
Thank you everyone for being brave and sharing your horrifying stories. I think we can all agree someone told at least one that didn't make us feel that bad about ours. Besides it's like a mini work out reading all these, cause I'm laughing so hard. :D
KNOCK ON WOOD nothing yet!!!! ooooo my goodness I am sure I will though hahahaha I love these stories!
Okay, so I'm an avid poster on here but I actually created a new handle just to tell this story because my FI sometimes goes on, and this is one of the only things I've never told him!
FFIL asked me to help him out with some bookkeeping on the computer one day. He left me instructions, because he wasn't going to be there when I started. Well, I wasn't too clear on one of the things in the program, so I went into Internet Explorer to Google help on the program. I know he checks his web history to clear it sometimes (he was laughing at FI for something he went on) and I was kind of embarrassed that I had looked up help, so I went to delete mine.
Right before the site I had gone to was a couple different medical help/advice sites about male orgasmic disorder! I swear my face turned SO RED. Luckily I was alone!
So about a week later, we were all having dinner and FMIL & FFIL were bickering about something. FMIL had roses on the table, and she goes, "the flowers that [FFIL] bought are going limp... just like him!"
I'm pretty sure that she thought only FFIL would get that, but I totally understood... and it was so awkward!
AHAHAHAHA That farting one is HIALRIOUS! I literally LOL!
OK mine happened this past Thanksgiving:
We were at his aunts house and his whole family was over. We were playing catchphrase (if you've never played it, look it up. Its a really fun game) So the idea is to get your team to say the word that is on the card by using words that are associated with it.
So we were on our second bottle of wine and I dont know what I was thinking but it was my BF's turn and he was trying to get us to say the word "package" and prefaced it with
"I have a huge....."
and I shouted out PENIS!!!!
And everyone started cracking up, I was soooo mortified. Luckily everyone laughed it off.
Okay. So the day before FSIL's wedding I am sitting in the living room with the whole family. I'm talking to one FBIL, and I gave him my number so he could have it when we left. 2 seconds later my phone starts to ring. I don't know the number so I answer really carefully, "Um...hello?" "Hey! Now you have my number!!!" My reply? "Who the heck is this?" Everyone busts up laughing. It was FBIL and he was kitty corner from me. I wanted to DIE!!!
@HoneyBear: OMG, that's a lot like when we were playing and I was trying to get my DH to say "bagel" So I thought, Einstien Bros. Bagels. I tell him "Einteins!"
And he SHOUTS "Cock!"
Cue silence, then hilarious laughter. I guess he referenced a line from 3000 Miles to Graceland but I was so embarassed!! (Line: What's the smartest thing to ever come out of a woman's mouth? Einstein's cock.)
(As a sidenote, SORRY ABOUT THE MULTIPLE POSTS!! My cat just SAT on my fricken keyboard and it submitted like 7 times. Again, SORRY!)
@FrostyGirl: I can't believe she said that in front of everyone. I've had similar things happen to me with my own family. 
I'm glad FI doesn't come on here... I just air out all my dirty little secrets. LOL.
@HoneyBear: LMAO! That is SO something I'd do! I'll have to remember to never play that game.... Of course Fi's family would NEVER let me forget it and good lord the ribbing he'd get from his sister's hubs
@His Barista- I'd do the SAME thing, matter of fact I almost did. I gave his brother my number and I left. A few seconds later I get a text from a strange number that has a smiley on it. I texted back "Who are you?". Of course it was FBIL
@ Mighty Sapphire: It's ok my cat's do the same thing. Here the story about the guy who got arrested for having kiddie porn on his computer... he swore up and down that it was because of his cat sitting on the keyboard. I don't believe his story but now when I'm going to bed or not going to be at the computer for awhile I definately shut it off- just in case
Mine happened the minute I met my FIL's.
FI and I were dating at the time and had been together since September - this happened at the start of December. He is in a male voice choir and I went to the Christmas Concert. He said his parents were going to be there and I asked if they knew I was going to be there and he said he thought they knew. SO the concert ends and I go to the front to find him and he's there talking to an older couple and another guy in the choir and FI gestures for me to come over. So I went over, all ready to meet his parents, and they turned around when they noticed someone with him and he just said, 'This is AnamCara.' And his mom had this blank look on her face for a split second and then it was like OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH - like a massive lightbulb went off over her head and she realized I must be there for FI (clearly she had no idea I existed or that he was dating anyone). Then he introduced me to his dad and there was lipstick on his cheek so I shook his hand and said it was nice to meet him and proceeded to WIPE HIS FACE WITH MY FINGER to rub off the lipstick. WHO DOES THAT??? Only the best part? It wasn't lipstick, it was just a little redness on his skin. I. Was. Mortified. I thought I was going to chip away at the floor and bury myself deep in the ground. And I never get embarrassed - it just rarely happens. This one was a doozy...
I haven't heard the end of it yet but thankfully everyone laughs about it.
(p.s. FI -then boyfriend- got an EARFUL for not telling them about me before we met - I felt like I was part of an ambush!)
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