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UGH I hate when people say that. It's so stupid and rude. Like, what does that question accomplish but making people feel uncomfortable? I don't know if there is an appropriate response to that. Most of the bees here are nicer than I am so I'll let them handle it since in my ideal world, the appropriate response would be a good old fashioned b***h slap.
oh i hated getting that!! sometimes i wasnt so nice in my response, but my usual was we're not in any rush. and usually people would then say 'good for you.' i guess everyone expects that as the female u are just sitting around waiting for it, and they almost feel bad. so when u say ur ok with it i think they realize it really is ok!! the way i saw it, divorce rate is so high, my parents are divorced, so the longer u wait to make sure everything is all good, the better! but i know what we all really want to say is f* off!!! lol
I like inappropriate responses to inappropriate questions, actually. I think "When are you getting married?" deserves "When it becomes your business, I'll let you know." But that's not very nice, is it?
Well I understand you ladies completely! I mean even my co-workers asked me yesterday "when is he going to propose". I mean come on people, if I had the answer to that question I just might be engaged already! But I simply replied very nicely, "let me put you on my speed dial, so if he does propose you will be one of the first to know!" :)
this book says to say, "what makes you ask?". i hate getting the dreaded "when are you getting married?" i've been getting it for the last 3 years and still nothing.
I was thinking about saying, "We were waiting on one more person to ask that question, so that after the question had been asked a million times we would finally find it appropriate to get married."
IDK I would prefer something straight to the point. My Mama always says to people, "They will get married when they get some d@*n money." Lol But that is no longer an excuse for us. LOL
Today someone referred to my BF as my fiance and I didnt correct her. I felt so stupid but I just couldn't get it in lol. I think since we have been together for a while people just assume that you are getting married. I guess my point is people are just clueless!
I guess I dont see it that way. I mean maybe they realize what you two have, maybe its clear to them that you two are serious and of course thats going to be in your future. It COULD be taken as a compliments that others see what you two share, unless they ask in some crazy rude way. I mean to be honest, for me as an outside party reading this, are they really that off if you are blogging on a WEDDING website? Not that they know that, but you are! Not trying to be rude or mean, I got that question a lot before I was engaged, and I have been previously married, and I cant say that it ever offended me. Its only offensive if you let it. I always took it as a compliment that people saw what my man and I shared together and that people could see us "tyin the knot"
@ KT Williams: sometimes people say it in a nice way and they just asking. But some people have the "WTH are you waiting for? He's just stringing you along. I'm insulting and questioning your womanhood/ his manhood." That is when I get offended.
I can tell that some people are genuinely excited for us because the proposal is coming, but it is the rude people that insult me.
I don't get why people are being so rude because I am 23, a grad student and he is 23 and just starting his career. I know that we have been dating since high school, but people don't understand that we want to start off our marriage with our own house and not be in debt.
I have one person at work who says "Why HAVEN'T you and T gotten engaged yet? " which pisses me off.
feel free to borrow this line from me that I said back to her when some nosy chick is rude ok?
I replied to her last time:
"You'll know when I'm engaged when you're stunned with temporary blindness from the shine and sparkle of the stone on my left hand."
She said nothing after that and hasn't asked again either. he he.
bella - that's HILARIOUS!!! great response.
i generally say - "what don't you ask my deveoted boyfriend what he has planned?" and smile and bat my eyelashes :)
I think it all depends on who is asking, and what their intentions are. If it's someone who is a friend, OK. But someone you just met, not their busienss. If someone is concenred, or perhaps clueless, just trying to make conversation, don't sweat it. But if they are somehow trying to rub it in, or make you feel bad (perhaps they are jealous...) then I would probably give them one of the lovely, snippy remarks mentioned :)
But I think a lot of the time, the rudeness or offense is taken by the receiver. As in, I think sometimes people are just asking and not thinking. And the gal who takes offense is the one who really wants to be engaged and isn't. So it hurts. Of course people should be sensitive to something like this. But again, sometimes they aren't thinking, and just don't realize.....
Awww bellenga, I like that response alot!
I got asked that question about 100 times last night from his congregation (that I met for the very first time!) and since I HAD to be nice, my response was "oh, I like him alot but you'll have to ask him!" Sweet old ladies, but man, way to rub it in on accident.
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to tell someone to mind their F'in business when they ask that oh so popular question of "So, when are you getting married?"
Why do the people with the worse relationships feel the need to chime in on your perfectly happy relationship.
Ugggghhhhhh!!!
Wine anyone???