(Closed) What is the proper etiquette??

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
666 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

You don’t have to pay for them.  It’s part of the “bridesmaid duties” really, but it should be clear ahead of time who i paying for what.  You don’t want them to be surprised.

Post # 4
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

If you’re requiring them to do this, then yes, you need to pay for it.  If it’s optional, then they pick it up.

Post # 5
Member
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

I think it is up to you if you can afford to pay for it or not.  If you can, then it is a nice thing to do for your bridesmaids.  If you can’t, then make sure they are aware beforehand of this and give them the option to bow out if money is an issue…

Post # 6
Member
2344 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think it is usually a part of the bridesmaids’ expenses, but if you can afford it, its a nice gift. I am paying for my bridesmaids’ hair, as well as mani / pedis the day before, but that’s my gift to them instead of jewelry.

Post # 7
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I agree with Johnsbride09.  If you are requiring them to go, then you should pay for it.  But if it’s optional, they can choose whether or not to go and to pay. If they choose to go get their hair done, they can also choose how to have it done, though most BMs would ask what style you wanted them to wear. 

Post # 8
Member
1490 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Even if it’s not required, it kind of feels that way, right? I wouldn’t want to be left out while the other BMs were getting their hair done and would feel bad if I couldn’t afford it.

Post # 9
Member
171 posts
Blushing bee

I was part of a wedding about a year ago and the bride made it clear that the mani/pedi spa day was all part of her gift to us. It was an amazing time to spend with the bride and all the other girls before the wedding. She also gave us a necklace to wear for the wedding so we would all match. I am definitely going to do this for my girls when my time comes!

Post # 10
Member
1022 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would also say that if it’s an optional thing then the bridesmaids pay for it but if you want ALL of them to do it regardless, then you should pay for it since there are usually already so many other expenses usually associated with being a bridesmaid.

Post # 11
Member
355 posts
Helper bee

i did a mass email to all the girls and told them that the salon asked when i tried to reserve it how many girls would be needing hair and who would be needing updos vs. styles and makeup, and had them email me back with what they wanted done. i worded it so that it was optional and included all the costs involoved since they’ll be paying for their own.

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