What Judgement / Stereotype Do You Have To Overcome Daily?

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 4
Member
3355 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

that I married my DH either for immigration or for money.

1. I got the visa sponsorship from my employer by myself. I didn’t need to get married for another 6 years if I wanted to.

2. I have my own job and my own income.

Post # 5
Member
3735 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Why don’t you kick it off? You might inspire some to share their own stories if they can relate to yours.

Post # 6
Member
2381 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

People think I’m not canadian because I’m black.  I get that almost every day.

Post # 7
Member
6407 posts
Bee Keeper

Men often think that because I’m a woman I will not know as much as they do about (Topic X we are debating about), or that if they get louder or use more threatening body posture, that will intimidate and stop me from making my points. Then, when they can’t win the argument, they tend to lose horribly ungraciously, throwing an outright tantrum, often involving shockingly misogynistic remarks, swear words, name calling, and stomping off.

Not all men are like this in a debate with me, but I would say over 80% are.

Post # 9
Member
2441 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Ok, I’ll bite… but I want to preface by saying that I’m NOT full of myself.

I’ll be 29 in a couple of weeks but usually pass for around 25-26, I’m small (size 0), have big boobs (real btw), I drive a BMW, I’m usually carrying a high end purse (today is LV), and I’m rarely without a Starbucks. I realize 100% how that looks to people especially when they first meet me. I look like a spoiled brat. I’m not, at all, far from it but I do understand that’s the impression that I can give off.

I deal with judgement a lot at work mostly… there’s a lot of people in this company who are pretty low income and live in a not so nice area of town and a lot of times they make some pretty judgemental comments towards me, bringing up my car and I’ve had a couple of plastic surgery comments (I’ve had no work done whatsoever). It sounds like such a stupid, first world thing to complain about but sometimes it really bothers me! I’ve had to work hard for everything I have and I’m proud of everything I have accomplished.

I’ve had people assume that my fiance bought me the car because he works for BMW, when in reality we met because he works there. That’s how we met, I was buying my own BMW!

Post # 10
Member
716 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@RockStar33:  This is a genuine question…. Do people ever call you African American? Because, ya know, you’re Canadian not American. Lol.

Post # 11
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

My weight.

At least, I feel that way. I’m not huge or anything, but I used to be tiny and now I’m not. I am incredibly conscious of it so I assume everyone else is too.

Post # 13
Member
917 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

People devalue my degree regularly. FI has a PhD in physics, mine (which I’m working on my dissertation for) is in art history. When we discuss our studies with people we meet he gets congratulated like he’s the next effing Einstein while I get a verbal pat on the head like I’m a simpleton. It’s demeaning and absolutely off base. I work just as hard as he did for his (frankly, harder sometimes). I just don’t do math for it. Ugh. I wish people would respect study in the humanities.

Post # 15
Member
6407 posts
Bee Keeper

Oh, and I know it doesn’t have to do with my debate style, because if it’s online and they don’t know I’m female, they tend to stay much calmer and if they lose it’s much more gracious…only about 20% of males flip out and have a meltdown when losing an online argument to someone they assume is a male.

Post # 16
Member
6407 posts
Bee Keeper

@Barbiestylez:  True, that can happen even female-female or male-male, but just much less so. If you’re a female winning an argument with a male, a lot of them are like “This…cannot…be….me…hulk…ARGGGHHH!!!”

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