At about 17-18, my body clicked, and I wanted a baby so bad. I’d almost tear up thinking about getting pregnant and seeing moms/babies, kid pictures on facebook, etc. Biological clock got started a little early.
When my FI and I moved in together about a year ago, this went away completely. I was loving being an adult with responsibilities only to myself, my FI, our animals, and my job. It was fantastic. I could put my elbows on the table and pick at my food, and I didn’t have to be a positive role model for anyone. We could go out of town last minute and spend all of our grocery money on eating out, and no harm was done to a child! (Obviously, we don’t make all of these decisions all the time, but the freedom was exhilirating.)
A few days ago at work, I was talking with coworkers about how much maternity leave we were allowed, and I had just gotten through telling her how it was not a big deal anyway, because we definitely weren’t having kids for a long, long, time, because we were enjoying just being young together…..and WHAM. It hit again. At 22, I am officially back in the throws of baby fever.
Admittedly I’m young, and I’ve always kind of figured I’d have kids, but at this point in my life, my hormones are running this show. Since I had that conversation at work, I’ve just had this longing, visceral feeling in the pit of my stomach. My biological clock is back with an effing vengeance.
It was so bad, and so sudden, that my first thought was “Oh my god, what if I’m pregnant and subconsciously I know it somehow, and I’m feeling guilty for just telling so-and-so that I didn’t want kids for a long time?” So I took a pregnancy test. Negative! My hormones are just driving me nuts.