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What Project Did You Give to Your Mother in Law?

posted 3 months ago in Family
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    1.
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    Busy bee
    Zusie    September 2, 2012  

    My mother-in-law lives several hundred miles away but wants to be involved in my wedding planning. I'm trying to think of a project to give her to do.

    What's your MIL doing to help?

     
    2.
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    Bee Keeper
    pinkshoes    July 2011   MA

    My MIL lives a 4 hours flight away also.  I wasnt really able to involve her, but she had full run of the rehearsal dinner planning.

     
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    Honey bee
    lefeymw    April 16, 2011   CT

    She negotiated the hotel block and arranged bus transportation to and from the reception and hotel for the guests.

    I also sent her emails asking her advice on things that were simple. Like which necklace she liked. Mostly I just sent her updating emails with pics etc so she felt like she was part of the process.

    I also let her pick out a card box. She got a cute bird cage. 

    She lived in MA, I lived in CA and the reception was in CT. 

     
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    Busy bee
    thursdayschild    May 2012   Port Hueneme, CA

    All we're asking is that she shows up in appropriate clothing and doesn't embarrass herself or us. Seriously.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    chasesgirl    December 30, 2011   East Texas

    She wanted to be crafty, so she made all the flower cones we used as decoration on the pews. She came up with several options, I picked what I liked best and she made them.

     
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    Bumble bee
    rebwana    July 13, 2012   Baltimore, MD

    My FMIL really, really wants to help, so we've asked her to do the hotel research for us. Maybe yours could also help with ideas for centerpieces/flowers? Transportation's another option. If you're doing a next day brunch, maybe researching that?

     
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    Blushing bee
    Ms.Clean    September 7, 2012  

    @thursdayschild:  Hahahahah I'm sorry but that made me laugh.Out loud.

     
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    Blushing bee
    orchid84    August 18, 2012   Seattle

    My FMIL was complaining about how she was not involved in our wedding planning and she got to plan her other DILs rehearsal dinner so I gave her full run of the rehearsal dinner. All After I did this, she said it would be too "stressful" to plan and told me to plan it by myself. Since I am planning 100% of the wedding by myself because my mom hates weddings, I planned it by cancelling it altogether- now she no longer asks about wedding stuff.

     
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    Busy bee
    Zusie    September 2, 2012  

    @orchid84:  I gave her and her ex-husband full run of the rehearsal dinner, I kind of thought that would be enough... especially since they haven't made any plans yet.

     
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    Helper bee
    Au Jardin    May 26, 2012   France

    Um, mine is pretty much planning the whole thing, ha... She lives where we are getting married, so it's helpful if she sets up the vendors and such. She's such a great woman....

     
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    Bumble bee
    MrsMeNow    September 18, 2010   Wisconsin

    @thursdayschild:  Exacltly what we did, and it was still too much to ask:(

     
    12.
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    Buzzing bee
    burris4    December 16, 2004   Illinois

    We told her she could go to Hell!  She is an absolute hellhound and I couldn't resist. :)

     
    13.
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    Buzzing bee
    MapleBecky    July 9, 2011   Canada

    Mine had the rehearsal, wine making and I let her throw me a shower. 

     
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    Busy bee
    SubmarinersBride    June 16, 2012  

    I've asked mine for a guest list with full names and addresses.  Still not complete.  Ugh.

     
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    Busy bee
    csperry2    October 6, 2012   Marietta, GA

    I'm in a very similar situation. FMIL is very far away... 

    We haven't involved her with the wedding planning at all... but she has COMPLETE control of the rehearsal dinner. She seems content.

     
    16.
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    Bumble bee
    peaches13    July 9, 2011   Texas

    She sent out the rehearsal dinner invites (though I chose the restaurant), and got all the beverages for the reception.

    ETA: My MIL had a dream about two months before the wedding that she had to be my substitute at work so I could prepare for the wedding.  After that, she begged me to give her projects, so that she wouldn't have to think about teaching second grade for me!

     
    17.
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    Helper bee
    mariwithani    May 26, 2013  

    @thursdayschild:  hahaha that's a fair compromise.

     

    My FMIL has taken it upon herself to research hotels and accomodations for our guests.  It's mainly because the majority of our out-of-town guests are from FI's side of the family so it's really important to her.  I'm hoping to let her plan the rehearsal dinner too but that's much further down the line for me.

     
    18.
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    Worker bee
    TiffanyMM    March 24, 2012  

    @thursdayschild: ;) I am hoping that happens with many of my family members...good luck!

    @Zusie:  Mine bought us our ceremony arbor and some decorations. I also let her do the cake. I feel bad having her do too much, since she is really one of the only one helping out.

     
    19.
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    Helper bee
    smcs28    July 6, 2013  

    Yup, my FMIL is in Florida (we're in ontario)....she is doing the rehearsal dinner, and she already knows where she is going to hold it and was so nice to do it at an irish pub since my back ground is irish :D  She is a thoughtful person and I have no worries of her being at the wedding .....

     
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    Bumble bee
    garden_bride    August 2012  

    My MIL really wanted to get involved...so I've decided to have her help with the invitations and just showing her our decisions along the way.

     
    21.
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    Busy bee
    thursdayschild    May 2012   Port Hueneme, CA

    @Ms.Clean:  Right?! It's sad, but I have to laugh too.

    @MrsMeNow:  That's my fear!

    @mariwithani:  I'm glad you think so!! I don't think I'm asking too much, but we'll see!

    @TiffanyMM:  Good luck to you as well!

     
    22.
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    Buzzing bee
    Pinksapphire      

    Sighh.  I have worked so hard to include my FMIL, so that should wouldn't feel left out or excluded.  But, she doesn't seem to much interested in helping with anything.  She's a major procrastinator, so depending on her for anything would just not be productive.  It took forever to get her to get her address book out of her office and give it to me.

     

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