What should I do?

posted 2 years ago in Parties
  • poll: What would you do
    Be "sick" : (2 votes)
    9 %
    Be honest and skip B-party : (13 votes)
    59 %
    Go to B-party cause you already said you would and skip the weekend away : (5 votes)
    23 %
    Teleport. : (2 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 2
    3217 posts
    Sugar bee

    If you aren’t close with the guest of honour, then skip it and go with your real friends.

    Life is too short to spend it doing things you don’t want (when it comes to parties at least).


    Post # 3
    42117 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Atalanta:  I definitely wouldn’t lie and be “sick” I guarantee that the bride will hear from someone about your trip out of town and her feelings will be hurt much worse than if you just tell her the truth.

    If you are travelling internationally for the wedding, to a place you used to live, just tell her that you now realize that in order to see all your friends and family, you will only be able to spend the wedding weekend with them. It would take a pretty self -centered and selfish person not to understand your conundrum.

    Post # 4
    3769 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    Did you partake in the planning of the b-party? When they specifically planned it on days you could attend, did you commit to it then? If so then I think you should go to the party. They planned it around your schedule and your should feel honored. If not and it just so happened to be planned that way, I would skip it if you would rather spend the time with your friends. I am kind a middle of the road person and would some how make the trip back for the b-party and still go with my friends, maybe rent my own car.

    Post # 5
    3246 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    ieatunicorns:  +1 did they plan the party for this weekend specifically so you could come? That would affect my answer.

    Post # 6
    6048 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I’d go with sick.  They didn’t plan the weekend for you to attend if your not close to her, it was really for your FI to attend.  If your FI, who knows the couple is good with you not going, I’d go with my friends.  

    Post # 10
    2455 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Atalanta:  If you aren’t too close I’m sure the bride won’t be devestated if you don’t go. But I wouldn’t lie about being sick. It could be really awkward if you’re “caught” and your FI has to lie for you et.


    I’d just get the bride a raunchy card with some money in it saying “Have a couple drinks, on me!” And call it a day. Go have fun with you’re close friends!!


    Life is too short to spend time doing things you don’t want to do. We already do enough things we HAVE to that we don’t want to

    Post # 9
    141 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Atalanta:  Is there definitely no way to make both things happen? Maybe your friends could start the weekend away earlier, or you could go the following Friday/Saturday (depending on when the wedding starts)?

    If possible I’d try to do both, not only because you committed already, but also because it’s a vacation and these are all fun events! I’d want to do as much as possible. Forgive the assumption, but I guess przyjedziesz do Polski, bo dobrze znam logo Żabki 😉 I went to a bachelorette party here last year where I only knew the bride and still had a BLAST. Plus going to działka is usually a pretty laid-back affair, I’m sure you could work it out to do both. Good luck and baw się dobrze!

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