What should I do about my bf?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
3836 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@vortex:  You plan ahead, have ambition and are very mature.  From what you describe, he lacks those qualities or has less of them than you.

Only you know if that is what you will want, every day of your life, for a partner.

Best wishes – I think you have a very bright future ahead of you!  *hugs*

Post # 4
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Are you in love with him? Are you prepared to be the leader, boss, and task master for all things in life? If the answer to both of those questions is “no”, then you should definitely leave.

Post # 6
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Think about how you feel–do you love him or is he just “safe”? When do you really want to be married, own a home, start a family, etc? Do you have any deadlines for these things? Are you okay with waiting until your BF matures? Are you okay with the risk and adventure associated with striking out on your own?

For me, motivation and ambition in my partner is very important. Not everything is about money; to me I value a man that seeks out new goals and then completes them. Indecisiveness     drives me crazy.

However, a man with good character is also important. Nobody is perfect…you have to decide what is most important to you, what you are willing to compromise on, and how long you’re willing to wait.

Talk to your man about all of this. Be honest but not demanding. Let him know that he doesn’t have a whole year to hem and haw over his response to you. Good luck!!!

Post # 7
425 posts
Helper bee

@vortex: To give me a better idea of the cultural context, would you mind telling me which country you’re living in? 

Post # 8
1952 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I would actively consider leaving him. He sounds like he has no motivation, only potential. We all have potential, but if we don’t act on it, it’s useless. It would be tough leaving him after it’s all you’ve known but it might do you some good.

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