Post # 1
Im not very good with words and I need some help!!I want to send some flowers to a funeral today that I am not able to attend,It is my brothers MIL, they where very close and she was also very young (49).
I feel so horrible for them, I can never find good things to say in situations like this.
And words of advice?
also what does it mean if it says this “In lieu of flowers the family requests memorials be given to the family.”
Post # 3
In lieu of flowers means instead of. Honestly most flowers people send get thrown out or donate to nursing homes.
Post # 4
@alyssars1: In lieu of flowers means they would rather you make a donation to a charity (usually specified in the obituary) instead of flowers. I usually keep flower cards pretty simple. Something like “All my/our love” or “Deepest condolences”.
Post # 5
Hmm…that means they don’t want flowers sent. Usually people request donations be made to different organizations in the deceased’s name. It’s odd to me that memorials be given to the family without specifying what the money will be used for.
When my grandmother passed away a couple of months ago, my aunt absolutely did. not. want. flowers. She said my grandmother deserved to have flowers in life and that they’re a waste now. People still sent a few flowers, so she donated those to the Alzheimer’s center where Gramma lived. Most everyone else donated money to her church.
Post # 6
That means that they’d rather received donations instead of flowers. While its more common to request donations be made to a specific organization, it’s not unheard of to have it directed at family. Often times when that happens, its because the family needs some help to cover medical bills, funeral costs, etc or in the case of a sudden loss, help the family with general expenses while they sort out the sudden lack of income. In my region, it’s not viewed as any different from requesting donations to a charity.
If you have already purchased the flowers or intend to send them anyway, my suggestion is to keep the card simple. I lost my dad less than a month ago. I don’t remember what a single card said. All I did was look for a name to address the thank you cards to. I appreciated the sentiment very much but everything was such a blur that I just didn’t register what any of them said.