What should we do? :(

posted 2 years ago in Career
Post # 2
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

FutureMrsB123:  🙁 i’m sorry things aren’t working out. did your DH have anything in writing, an official job offer or something, before you guys moved? if he did, then he has some recourse. he has it on paper that he was offered (and accepted) the position and he’s now not being given any of what was promised.

if there wasn’t any actual job offer or anything on paper, i’m afraid there isn’t really anything he can do since you guys moved on good faith. 🙁 that sucks… has he talked to BIL to find out why this is not working out as suggested?

i would also look into moving back to your hometown if neither of you sees any potential job fortune in the area you’re in now. also, look for jobs outside of your mom’s area too, if that’s a place you might move back to. basically, keep all options open. in addition, i don’t know where you live but if it comes down to it, you might consider getting on food stamps or some other type of government assistance to ease things while you find a new job/he finds a new job.

Post # 3
Member
715 posts
Busy bee

FutureMrsB123:  Sorry that it hadn’t turned out like you hoped it would. I think you and DH need to talk about what you want in the future & what your priorities are. What is most important to you?  Having a good job? Being close to family? etc.

Post # 7
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

FutureMrsB123:  i definitely understand your frustrations. see if you can find that piece of paper. if you can, take it to DH’s human resource manager or someone a lot higher up than BIL. even if BIL wrote it, there might still be some kind of internal solution that his job can offer. they might not do anything, but if there is something in writing that says DH was promised $X for Y Job starting Z Date, and then he’s not been given any of that, they might be able to help. Then again they might not so you definitely need a backup plan.

i would suggest not moving to NC unless that’s one of the places that you have family with whom you can live. moving again on faith, in the hopes that something will work out without anything in writing is not a good idea, unfortunately. i would consider moving back in with a family member, and using that as an opportunity to save any and all money you can. then, when you’ve saved up for a while, look for jobs (online) in other cities. look up apartments and average costs of living in that chosen city too, so you’ll know if the jobs you’re looking at will even cover expenses. apply for open positions (not word of mouth positions). hopefully if it’s a job with a company that really wants you/him, the company can help with moving expenses.

 

good luck, bee. i know it’s tough but with a plan, it’ll get better 🙂

Post # 8
Member
6273 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i’m not sure what kind of company this is, but i’ve always received an official letter of acceptance with my salary and start date. your husband should find this letter ASAP and bring it to HR and show that he is ready to work.

 

Post # 11
Member
2245 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

FutureMrsB123:  I thought you were going to say it was some disorganized tiny family business. If he’s working at a resort his wages should have been made clear to him before he started. There is no way they can legally tell him he will be paid one thing, and then short him on his paycheck. Something sounds off.

Post # 12
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

FutureMrsB123:  ohhhh okay! so i have one last bit of input then: like i said before, he should inquire with an HR managaer and relay what he was told. in the meantime, he should look for jobs within that company for other, better paying positions if available just so y’all have something for the time being. also, you can be blunt but nice with BIL and SIL: “guys, we moved here under the impression that DH would be working at X job for $pay. since that is not happening, we have no reason to stay here when we can move somewhere with better opportunities for us both.” in reality, you don’t owe them an explanation…but if you wanted to say something you could say something along those lines.

also, it’s awesome that he’s already got food experience…i was thinking you guys were just hoping he could find something because he’s a foodie, lol. absolutely save up and move somewhere with better opportunity! 🙂

Post # 14
Member
715 posts
Busy bee

FutureMrsB123:  from what you’re saying it really sounds like it would be best if you packed up & got decent jobs elsewhere. it’s true: you don’t need to make other people happy, you need to make yourself happy. and this situation with bil/sil sounds really toxic too. hope you’ll get a fresh start!

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