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Is your wedding daytime or evening. Can we see an image of your dress?
i was in same boat, so we chose an almost business casual look, suit pants and vest, rolled up sleeves, leaving the coat behind, i think it is fun!
here are some of my inspiration photos...
My wedding is October 17th in the evening. It will be outdoors at a lighthouse in Oregon. I don't have access to dress files right now, but here's a similar dress (this one is light ivory while mine is more medium ivory):


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Hey Bees,
I need help!
My FI is about the most casual guy in the world. He likes t shirts, jeans, and flip flops. His initial idea for our wedding was to do luau style and wear Hawaiian shirts. Not unless we marry in Hawaii, please! He is a surfer, as are his groomsmen and they like comfort and casual!
We were originally thinking the guys could wear just dress shirts and slacks but I asked him to hold off on decisions until I found my dress. I now have my dress and it is pretty elegant. I think it would be weird for the guys to look super casual while I'm all dressed up.
The guys don't want to wear tuxes and it may be too much to ask for suits. We're doing a destination wedding in Oregon and the bridesmaids are wearing black dresses with aqua blue earrings (our main wedding color). I'm trying to think of how to have the guys look nice but not dressing up so much that my FI and his guys are totally uncomfortable.
HELP!