What time to put on invites???

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What time should I put?
    Half an hour early : (7 votes)
    10 %
    Correct time : (58 votes)
    83 %
    Half an hour early but mention correct time on website : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Other, I'll explain below : (4 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    1749 posts
    Bumble bee

    I think 15 – 20 minutes early would be good.

    It’s enough time for people who would be late to arrive on-time, and the punctual people won’t be left waiting for too long. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    8905 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    Just put the regular time. People know to arrive early, it’s not rocket science. I’d be super annoyed if I showed up at 4-4:15 for your wedding and it didn’t actually start til 5 and you had lied about the start time!

    you could start the ceremony 5-10 minutes late, but more than that is pretty rude IMO.

    Post # 4
    Member
    288 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I’m putting 5pm on the invites and anticipatin starting about 10 min “late”.  But we are having a really short ceremony, as in 15 min max.  If you are having a full blown catholic mass I would not ask people to be there 30 min early.  I think its just safer to start a little late.  

    Post # 5
    Member
    1248 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    You put the correct time. most adults know to arrive a little early for a wedding and make sure they do so. You will always get one or two people who are running late but you do not punish the rest of your guests by having them sit there 45 plus minutes waiting for your ceremony to start. I arrive 15-30 mins early for a wedding and would be super annoyed. I had a couple arrive a few minutes late for my wedding apparently. I say apparently because I did not notice as I was focused on the ceremony. My mum told me after. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    175 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Ayybety:  I think you really should put the correct time. It is tempting because it is a shame when guests turn up late, but any respectful adult would show up early or the very latest on time for a wedding. You could always start 5-10 minutes late, like lolot:  mentioned, that is reasonable. Some people especially church goers (if your wedding is in a church) will show up early, so to keep them waiting would be a bit disappointing for them.

    Post # 7
    Member
    411 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I would be really annoyed if I discovered you’d put the “wrong” time because you thought I couldn’t be a proper adult and arrive on time. Maybe that’s just me. When it’s a wedding, people should make extra effort to be on time, if not early. I’ll normally arrive 10-15 minutes early – you then start a half hour the time and I’ve been sitting in a church/waiting in a park/standing in the sun for 45 minutes. 

    If someone was late during my ceremony, yes, I’d be annoyed, but I would also expect them to come up to me after, explain the situation and as long as it was reasonable, I’d get it. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    6505 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Put the actual time. I’m an adult and I know that I need to allow time to park. I would likely be there by 4:15 and would be seriously annoyed at the wait.

    I was at a wedding where the couple did this last year. We waited for almost an hour and it bugged me quite a bit (along with almost everyone else there). It just started the entire thing off on the wrong for because everyone was so sick of waiting by the time the ceremony started that they just wanted to move on to the reception.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3707 posts
    Sugar bee

    My daughter’s invitation said 6:00 PM – the actual start time, but when people RSVP online, they’re getting an e-mail in return, to confirm, which notes at the top that there will be a musical prelude, from 5:30-6:00, so hopefully that will get the guests there on time. If they’re late, they get to sit in the back, and since the ceremony is in a large theatre auditorium, it’s not an ideal viewing situation. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    3935 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Ayybety:   We put the actual start time of the ceremony.   

    Post # 11
    Member
    1768 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Our invitation time is 2:30, and we’ll all be ready to go at 2:30, but we have a 10 minute buffer in case it looks like a lot of people are running late (our ceremony venue is in a very popular/large/busy park and it can be difficult to find parking). On our website (and when it has come up in conversation), we’ve mentioned that the doors open/prelude starts at 2.

    Post # 12
    Member
    332 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: Davis Island Garden Club

    I would put regular time. Like PPs said, some people will get there early and it’s really not fair to them. If your about to start and notice more empty seats than you want you can wait a few minutes to begin. Just make sure you have someone blocking the entrance so they don’t wander down the aisle right behind you, a wedding coordinator/waiter/DJ will be able to instruct them to wait until you are up at the alter. I’ve seen this happen

    Post # 14
    Member
    3223 posts
    Sugar bee

    Why in the world would you punish the people doing the right thing/arriving on time, in favour of the idiots who are late?

    If they are late then they miss out.

    Maybe if everyone stopped accomodating them, they’d get their shit together and start geting places on time.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1119 posts
    Bumble bee

    Our ceremony is at 12 but guests have to be in at least 10 mins before so we need to put an earlier time or people won’t get in. 

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