- 4 years ago
- Wedding: May 2015
I am having the greatest BM dilemma ever and desperately need help & advice.
First, I have plenty of time to decide, and I know this…I am not planning on officially asking anyone until this coming spring, since we are getting married in May 2015. I just want to have an idea of what I’m going to do, and I’m finding it hard to decide!
I definitely have a Man of Honor, one of my longtime friends, and definitely my closest friend. That is already established, and I’ve already asked him.
FI really wants a small wedding party. His sister had 5 BM and 5 GM (he was one of the GM), and he says that was way too many. So we had initially talked about having 2 on each side, since he has a BM he would like to have and one other close friend. I was going to ask one of my longtime friends (since preschool, actually!), and that was going to be that.
The more I’ve been thinking about my bridal party, though, I really want to add a third girl! She is another very longtime friend, and we’ve been through a LOT together. I can’t imagine not having her stand up for me during my wedding. I even thought about how we could do it–have my MOH and FI’s BM walk in with my second BM, and then his other GM and my third BM walk in together. Perfect, right?
But the problem is, my second BM has a sister that I’ve known for an equal amount of time. Granted, we have never been as close, but grew pretty close over the past 3 years when she and I lived in the same town and her sister (my BM) lived 8 hours away. I could rationalize not asking her when it was just going to be 2 on each side, but if I add a third girl, and don’t ask her, I can see her being devastated. It’s not that I don’t want her in the wedding, and I realize I could do 4 and 2, but I just don’t want to do that! She doesn’t have many friends, so I think in her mind we are closer than we are in my mind, if that makes sense. I just don’t want her to be devastated over me picking her sister and not her. Also, FI has 3 sisters, and I thought maybe I could add a 4th girl and he could have his 3 sisters on his side, and that would be kind of a cute effect…but that would be a much larger party than FI is comfortable with.
Thoughts, please, bees! What would you do?!