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I'm getting married in CA in March 09 and will have another reception in PA in September 09. So we are waiting a while, mostly for financial purposes. Anyways, the second reception will be very casual. Instead of a wedding dress, I will wear a white sundress. We are offering casual food (BBQ, finger food, etc) and lots and lots of alcohol. It's just a get together, more like a BBQ for the entire town where my FI grew up. I don't think a lot of thoughts need to go into it, just another excuse for people to get together. It's not a bad idea to have the wedding video play at this second reception though, we might have to do that.
Definitely have pictures avaiable if you can. Even if they are not the photogs and just some shots from a family member's camera so everyone can see how stunning you looked.
I think you are on the right idea as far as it being more of an open house atmosphere. I've never seen a 2nd reception with all of the traditional stuff other than a toast that offered to the couple. The toast came right before the cake was cut but there was no feeding each other going on. Just cut and serve.
What to wear depends on the formality of the event. If it is way casual than a nice dress or pant suit is acceptable. If it is a little more formal I would go with a nice suit for both of you. And I don't see why you couldn't wear white!!
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I'm getting married mid-December in my college town, which is 1000 miles away from the place that I've grown up all my life. My parents want to have a second reception for us at my home church sometime after the wedding (it might be as much as a month after, seeing as Christmas and New Years will come up pretty quick after the honeymoon). Neither the reception that we'll throw for ourselves or the one my parents will do are going to be very elaborate.. I don't even know if we'll have more than cake and snacks at either.
So my question is: what do people do at a second reception? I've thought about having our wedding video played (if we can afford a videographer) and if we have our proofs back, maybe have a photo album. Would it be best to just have it like an open house, just greeting people as they come and socializing with them?
And random last thought -- what should I wear? Something white?