What to do with bossy Bridesmaids

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
2150 posts
Buzzing bee

FuschiaRose:  Talk to the bossy BMs. Tell them that their behavior was very rude and if it continues, you’re going to have to ask them to step down as BMs. You don’t need that kind of behavior while you’re trying to plan your wedding. If they aren’t going to be supportive (or at least constructively critical), then they can GTFO. 

Post # 3
Member
8720 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I am a blunt person so I believe in telling people how I feel. Also, I wouldn’t involve them as much in the futUre. I went to a few bridal shows and I wouldn’t have ever even thought to drag/bring my friends/bridesmaids. I went with my mom or husband (FI at the time). As a bridesmaid I wouldn’t be thrilled about going to one. Maybe that’s why they had the attitude? Are they normally like that?

Post # 4
Member
2865 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think a lot of people (because of movies and TV) an over inflated idea of what bridesmaids get an opinion on and how much help they are when you are planning. In real life, it can either be a great experience with your besties to have them help you can plan, or more commonly, it can be a TOTAL HEADACHE. It gets to be a “too many cooks in the kitchen” with extra opinions you don’t need to hear.

I would go to a “show up with the dress” mentality with your BMs who are being a pain. Since your MOH is beint supportive, take her to things if you want.

Post # 5
Member
2639 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

You aren’t being unreasonable. So. Tell them that you chose them because you thought they would be supportive of you through this time. If they can’t be there for you now in a positive manner, then they don’t need to be there stressing you out on your wedding day. 

Post # 6
Member
7385 posts
Busy Beekeeper

FuschiaRose:  Whilst I don’t condone rude behaviour can I ask how them going to the bridal expo with you came about? Was it a mandatory BM event or just an invitation to come along with you? They may have also been upset that you wanted to go and do soemthing else for your wedding after they had already given you the time for the expo. Just some thing to consider. 

 

Post # 7
Member
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

What color were the shoes?

Post # 8
Member
2642 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

j_jaye:  +1

I’m sorry your BMs were rude to you!  But maybe jaye is right in that she was annoyed about the surprise shoe shopping trip.  Also, are you requiring specific shoes and are you paying for said shoes?  If she has to pay for them, then I can understand her standing her ground on something she did not want.  Now that’s no excuse for any rude behavior, but it might help to see where she’s coming from so you can address the issue appropriately. 

Post # 9
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I learned very quickly that when it comes to wedding planning, you TELL people, don’t ASK! It’s your wedding. If you’re unable to confront them, I would just plan what you would like them to wear or do and then nicely tell them that that is what you have chosen.

Post # 11
Member
441 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Weddings can bring out weird emotions in people. I’d say if they’re not behaving like their normal selves just tell them “show up in the dress” like another commenter said, and hope they become your good friends again afterwards.

Post # 13
Member
441 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

You can always get back at them by picking ugly bridesmaids dresses 🙂 🙂 jk!

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