Post # 1
Our wedding is just about a month away. My brother (groomsman) has a new girlfriend as of a couple of months ago. We’ve hung out with her a handful of times, and I really like her and hope she’s around for awhile. I’m trying to decide if I should ask her to participate in the ceremony, and if so in what capacity. One of my cousins and one of FH’s cousins are currently guestbook/gift attendants – I think I could add a 3rd as they’ll be helping to carry gifts into the facility (wedding is outdoors). Reading something (we don’t know for sure if we’re doing any readings yet)? See if she wants to be the guys’ attendant so she can hang out with my brother (is that a thing?) Any ideas? I just want to make sure she feels included. It’s kind of at that weird stage where you know eachother, like eachother, but I don’t know if they’re going to be really serious or not.
Post # 2
lala3005: I don’t know, if I had just started dating someone for a few months, I wouldn’t expect to be included in their sibling’s wedding at all. In that situation I might just want to attend as a guest with no responsibilities. Maybe ask your brother what he thinks she would prefer?
Post # 3
lala3005: I don’t know that she expects to be included (I wouldn’t be if I had just been dating someone a few months). If I were her, I wouldn’t want to be. I’d just want to make sure I can hang out with my boyfriend at the reception since its likely I wouldn’t know anyone besides you and the parents.
Post # 4
I wouldn’t include her. It seems weird, what if they break up? You’ll think back to your wedding and the readers, and you will barely remember who this girl is. If you want to include her, I would invite her to hang out with you and your bridesmaids as you get ready, instead.
Post # 5
Like previous posters, I wouldn’t include her. I’m sure she’ll be happy to attend.
Post # 6
- Wedding: April 2015 - Family Farm
Do not include her. I’ve been asked to do somethign like that and felt SOOOOOO weird. It’s hard to decline too. She will be much happier enjoying the wedding.
Post # 7
I agree with the others. I doubt she feels the need to be included, and it would be awkward to have take a role in your ceremony, as she just started dating your brother. I’m sure she’s happy to just attend your wedding.
Post # 8
I wouldn’t include her, although she should of course be invited and made to feel welcome.
Post # 9
I’d invite and not include especially since you don’t really know her. She may feel awkward and that it’s too new after just a few months and if it doesnt’ work out, then it turns out some random girl played a part in your wedding that you dont even keep in contact with.
Post # 10
I’m with everyone else – don’t include her in the wedding as anything but a guest.
Post # 11
lala3005: I would not include a new girlfriend in your ceremony, and I really imagine she’d prefer it that way too. That’s a bit intimdating, and could make her feel like she has to be very committed to your brother. If you really like her and want to include her in some way, you could offer to let her get her nails done with you or something with the prep, but I would leave it alone otherwise.