Post # 1
For about 6 months, FI and I were going back and forth about whether to go forward with a March 15, 2008 wedding because FMIL has stage 4 cancer. We were hopeful that she would make it to the wedding (she even started on a really promising new drug), however it now looks like the cancer is progressing and we are now serioulsy considering postponing. My lovely BMs had a shower for me last weekend and I am wondering what the etiquette is regarding the gifts? Most columns lump together wedding cancellations and postponements and say that gifts must be returned. We’re still very much getting married but the current timing is impossible.
Any advice would be much appreciated.
Post # 3
Since it is a postponement due to family illness, I’m sure your guests will understand. You’re still getting married, so keep your shower gifts. But you should not expect another shower closer to your later wedding date.
I’m so sorry to hear about your FMIL. I wish her all the best and I hope the new drug works wonders.
Post # 4
I’m in a similar situation, but with my father. We are postponing a year. We told each guest immediately when we decided to post pone, and everyone was very supportive and understood completely. With a little background on the reason for the postponement, I don’t think people really care about the "by the book etiquette", I know I wouldn’t as a guest! I think the postponement "by the book rule" only applies to cases where the bride and groom are reconsidering, which obviously doesn’t apply to you.
I wish your FMIL and your family the best, and I hope she responds to the new treatment.