Post # 1
I have a couple friends who are pregnant and are really concerned about their weight gain. I try to listen and empathize, but I was realizing that I end up saying something like: it’s normal to gain weight, don’t worry about it – you can lose whatever weight after the baby, etc…. but I’m wondering if that’s not helpful and I should just shut my mouth and listen.
Thoughts from pregnant bees out there?? (and – keep in mind, these girls are not gaining a ton of weight – more like the normal amount during pregnancy….
Post # 3
I really can’t relate, so far, even though I am 20 weeks pregnant, because I have gained less than a pound so far, but I think your best bet really is to just listen, and make sure to pay them compliments when they are looking good (my co-workers always make me feel amazing telling me how great I look, how cute my belly is, how nice my skin looks, so even if I was gaining a lot of weight I would feel nothing but awesome around them!)
Post # 4
@oracle: I agree you should say something nice. Your skin is glowing, your hair is flawless, you look so happy!
Post # 5
I agree, tell them how pretty they look with the changes pregnancy brings. I know I’m going to get fat but I’ll believe anyone who tells me I look great pregnant 🙂 Take the focus off of the weight.
Post # 6
No matter what, tell them they look great. “You’re not fat, you’re pregnant and glowing, you look amazing!” always boosts the confidence, even if you aren’t being 100% sincere haha. And no boob comments. Those made me the craziest.
Post # 7
I agree with all the PPs about complimenting them on other things and taking the focus off weight! Tell them about their hair, their skin, their glow, how cute their bellies are, how young they look, talk about fun baby stuff…. 🙂
Post # 8
My friend, who is also pregnant, told me this the other day: Weight gain is hard because it goes against everything you’ve been taught for the past 30 years. But you have to remind yourself that if you weren’t gaining weight, the pregnancy wouldn’t be a healthy one.
It helped to put it in perspective. And some of my coworkers make sure I get walks in during the day so I stay active. Maybe if you offered to be a walking buddy to help your friends stay active and healthy, then they’ll be gaining the right type of weight.
Post # 9
@KatyElle: Agree with always say you look fantastic! Also, a friend commented that my boobs were becoming jessica simpson esque. Ugh, thanks, she has the largest boobs when not pregnant and is out of control pregnant.
Post # 10
Agree with PPs. Gaining weight IS normal, but like someone else said, it goes against what we have been taught our entire lives. It’s REALLY hard to get out of that mindset. One of my friends really struggled with this and rather than telling her it was normal (because she clearly wanted a normal and healthy pregnancy), I found it was best to just say “You look beautiful!” or some sympathy helped too “Ugh, it must suck to see those pounds move up on the scale…but it’s ALL baby, you look awesome!” Etc.
Post # 11
Just listen and compliment, don’t say it is normal as this will confirm their fears that you can see the fat too, just say that you dont think they look fatter they just have a cute bump, great boobes and are glowing!
Post # 12
Being pregnant myself right now, there really is nothing that anyone else can say that will make me feel better about pregnancy weight gain. Honestly, when talking to friends about it, I was really talkng just to vent. Everyone knows you gain weight when pregnant, but when it actually starts happening, it kinda sucks!
Post # 13
I’ve been doing this a lot lately because my baby bump has really exploded in the past couple of weeks and it’s freaking me out a bit. Everyone keeps telling me how adorable I look and that I’m glowing, but I feel the best when they tell me I’m crazy and that I’m still tiny. Or that it’s just all baby and in my belly. Or that they hope they look as good as I do when they get pregnant. I still feel gross and am scared of how huge my belly is getting, but it does make me feel better for the time being.