Post # 1
So I am running a little late on the thank yous, due to a health thing with my brother…I have all but the last ten done. One of those is to my father’s mother. She recently came back into our lives in the past three years, moving into my parent’s home after my aunt threw her out. She and I have no relationship, if I had my way she would not have acknowledged at all, but you can’t acknowledge one grandmother and not the other. She moved into my parent’s home right after I moved in with DH, who was then the boyfriend. She wants to have the relationship she missed out on when I was a child, but my focus is my marriage not making her feel better for all she missed. Here is where my problem is..I don’t know what to say to her beyond “Thank you for attending our wedding, and for the beyond generous gift”… I suppose the biggest problem, and I feel like such a jerk for feeling this way, is I don’t like her. How do I sound gracious without sending a cookie cutter card? She is the type to compare cards with others and my siblings and parents are (bridal party and paid) in the same house.
Post # 3
@crr219191: I guess my thoughts on this are: If you do not like her… Then clearly her card won’t be as personal as your siblings/parents..so do a generic “cookie cutter” card…She can compare all she wants, but you shouldn’t have to lie or fake your way through a card… you know what I mean?
At the end of the day, at least you are sending her one….
Just my two cents, maybe I am in the wrong on this….
Post # 4
I have a large variety of folks in my family who are difficult to deal with (to make a long story short).
Don’t feel obligated.
If she wants to be comparative that’s her problem. You don’t have to make her problems your problems!
Post # 5
It’s easy, just thank her for the gift, give a little song/dance about how the item will come in so handy in your new home. If she gave money, how much the generous gift will help towards establishing your new little family. Tell her you were so glad she could make it and hope she had a wonderful time. Love you and DH and be done with it. DH refused to write out Thank you notes so I put some of the same things in the thank you notes to his side of the family.