What will change when you get married?

posted 1 year ago in Emotional
  • poll: What should/will change for you after you get married?
    Your living situation (Move in together and/or own a home) : (82 votes)
    16 %
    Your contraceptive situation (Change it or stop using it to try for kids) : (73 votes)
    15 %
    Your intimacy situation (Start having it or do newer, weirder things ;D) : (45 votes)
    9 %
    Your priorities (SO comes first, always, in a way they didn't before marrying) : (57 votes)
    11 %
    Your recreation (No more long nights of drinking, no more impromptu travels) : (16 votes)
    3 %
    Your money (saving more, spending less, consulting before buying more than before) : (115 votes)
    23 %
    Nothing, things are perfect already : (97 votes)
    19 %
    Other : (16 votes)
    3 %
  • Member
    3000 posts
    Sugar bee

    @Bebealways:  Well, we already live together and have been on the same page about finances, children, sex and most things. The biggest changes will be that I will take his last name and we are going to open a joint checking account (only for bills though).

    Member
    44 posts
    Newbee

    Nothing will change immediately besides my name – we already live together, share incomes and whatnot but we do plan on TTC almost immediately after the wedding (we’ll both be 31 and want 2 kids so we want to start sooner rather than later) so contraceptive use will definitely change!

    Member
    573 posts
    Busy bee

    The only thing that will change for us is that we will be trying for a baby right after we get married. We are both childless and divorced. I am 27, but he is 42… so based on his age, we want to get moving on the baby making ASAP.

     

    Member
    2251 posts
    Buzzing bee

    For us, the only thing that will change when we get married is my last name.

    Edited to add: And I just remembered, our finances. Once we’re married, we will have one account where our wages go into and bills come out of, plus a joint savings and then seperate spending accounts which a certain amountof $$ per week goes into and a personal savings account as well – cause FI-to-be won’t tolerate me spending $1,500 of our money on shoes and I refuse to see hundreds of dollars of our money being spent on beer and bar snacks each week!

    Member
    1362 posts
    Bumble bee

    Nothing, except I will be able to save money instead of putting it towards the wedding.

    I may change my last name and eventually we will probably buy a house and have kids, but not for quite a while. We already live together, our finances will remain as they are and we’re already intimate. So there’s nothing that will change really.

    Member
    146 posts
    Blushing bee

    Nothing wil change except I will take his last name and will stop taking the contraceptive pill (but that’s probably quite a big thing!)

    Member
    6874 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Only two things will change.

    1. My last name.

    2. We’ll start searching for a house to buy [currently renting].

    Member
    1917 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Nothing will change relationship-wise. We still put each other first and don’t expect any changes in behaviour or treatment of each other, however there will be a few changes in situation – we will hopefully have bought a house by next year, we will start trying to conceive this time next year, etc. But nothing about the actual relationship will change.

    Member
    7 posts
    Newbee

    Everything will change for us. We are not currently living together, and he has two wonderful kids, so starting after the honeymoon, I go from single and 38 living alone, to a family. We join our finances for household expenses, and I give up my two cats. Honestly, outside of loving him and his family, there is very little that will NOT change… and after living most of my life for myself, it is a change that terrifies me, and is exactly what I want.

    Member
    2264 posts
    Buzzing bee

    The only thing that changed is our legal status of being married. We already lived together, commingled funds, and decided to wait on kids before we even got engaged. Now we just file our taxes jointly.

    Member
    1243 posts
    Bumble bee

    Nothing will change for us. Already live together, plan to keep our finances separate for the foreseeable future. Not having children. Not taking his last name. Our relationship is wonderful as it is (respectful, don’t fight or bicker, good intimacy, shared hobbies). About the only thing that will change is who is the beneficiary on our insurance policies. 

    Member
    238 posts
    Helper bee

    - My name

    - The ability to arrange each others funeral instead of our parents

    - inherriting from each other

    - The feeling of being married is emotionally different for me and being able to really call him my husband after 8 years.

    - probably lots of other legal benefits

    Member
    349 posts
    Helper bee

    @Bebealways:  Great thread idea :)

     

    I voted ‘other”.  The only thing that will be changing for us is my surname lol.  FI and I started a joint bank account before we were even engaged.  We bought our first home together last year and have been living together since.  In regards to birth control,  we only use condoms atm and won’t be planning on TTC for a few years so I guess that will  stay the same too. 

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