- 5 years ago
I am a waiting bee. I have been for nearly a year. I have gone undercover for this question, because I’m not sure if anyone knows me on here or not.
So and I have been together for a year and a half. He started talking about marriage early on. I got excited, and have been waiting ever since. But lately he’s dragging his feet. Fine, that’s all well and good. If he wants to wait, I can wait. But now I have a dilema.
I have an associates degree in Science and have plans to go back to school to finish up two more degrees, which will take me a total of 22 months. Because it is a health care college, I am required to have health insurance at all times, and it’s friggin’ expensive through the college. Many people have suggested that SO and I get married as he is military and I would be under Tricare then. I’m not all for the idea, but it would make things easier. But that isn’t the main issue. The main issue I have, is that going to school full time, and working part time means that I will not be able to contribute as much as I do now. I make as much as my SO does now, if not a little bit more. I help in buying groceries to feed the two of us and the two children (1 his, 1 mine). I also take care of all of my own bills.
Previously I was married, and in that time I was also in school. My ex took care of all the financial things and held money over my head many times. I do not want to be in that situation again. Yes I would work part time, but I would also still somewhat be relying on my SO to help support me. I really do not want to do that unless I have more of a commitment from him. In this case, all I am asking for is a proposal. I’m not even saying that we have to get married right away.
I have mentioned to him that in the event that we are not engaged by the time I start school next August, that I will probably move back in with my mom until I am finished with school (all 22 months). It is not an ultimatum, it is a fact. I am not saying we will break up, I am saying that I have to cover my own ass as well as provide and protect my child.
Am I nuts? Do you think I am overreacting? Would you continue to live with your SO even if you were unable to put money toward the household bills and what not? **In our case they are minimal as we live on off base housing, which is paid for, as well as utilities. We only pay for internet. I still have my car insurance, health insurance, groceries, cell phone, and basic needs to see to. THankfully my job will accomadate a PRN schedule!***