- 4 years ago
- Wedding: June 2014
What would you do in this situation?
Sorry it’s long…
A couple of years ago my mom’s family had a family reunion and rented a house for a week. FI (my then BF) and I could only go for the weekend. My aunt, who rented the house, called my mom and said that, as there were young children in the house and she didn’t want to set a bad example, FI and I were to sleep in separate rooms. It wasn’t a big deal and I had no problem with it. My mom argued a little bit because she said that we live together, there’s no reason we can’t stay in the same room. In the end she gave in and we stayed in separate rooms. When we got there, my aunt had set FI up with a place to sleep on the floor of the living room and me on a blow up mattress in the corner of another room. We came in super late one night, spent the next day and night, and left in the morning. As we were getting ready to leave she said we could ‘make out a check to her for the $100 a night’. Uh…. $100 to sleep on the floor (when the other cousins didn’t pay anything to stay A WEEK)? My mom said no way and that she would talk to my aunt. We left, and then I found out that one of my other aunts gave my mom money ‘to help cover Iadornyou and her BF’s way’. WHAT?! We bought our own meals, no one paid anything for us.
Now one of my cousins is getting married and FI and I are flying back for the wedding. My aunt said that she wants FI and I to stay at her house and that she has plenty of ‘rooms and cots for people’.
Here’s the thing, at this point in my life I don’t want to sleep in a cot across the house from my fiancé. I’m 27 and he is 30, we are engaged and have lived together for three years. Now, I get that she wants to set a good example for her kids, and I’m all for that. No argument here. Except… well, there’s that one irritating piece about how when she wouldn’t let FI and I sleep in the same room because we are not married, she put her brother and his girlfriend in the same room together.
Double freaking standard.
My mom is irritated, too, and keeps talking about how when I was little my aunt kicked me out of my room and made me sleep with my mom so she could have that room for her and her boyfriend.
At this point I would rather just get a hotel room for FI and myself. I know if I do that my family will be offended, though, and it will cause drama. So, what should I do? Suck it up and sleep in a different room than FI, tell my aunt that I think she is being hypocritical and that if she would like FI and I to stay with her we would like to stay in the same room (sounds childish, lol), or just quietly get a hotel room and say ‘no thanks’ when the house is offered to us again and deal with any resulting drama?